Some people say that modern technology has made shopping today easier, while others disagree. Discuss both views and give your opinion You should write at least 250 words.

There is no doubt that these days the
last
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latest
show examples
model of
technology
change
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has changed
show examples
the world and a lot of things
are
Verb problem
have
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disapperared
Correct your spelling
disappeared
even some jobs will not be with us next years. So, some people think that
this
technology
is the reason
for
Change preposition
apply
show examples
why
the
Correct article usage
apply
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shopping
become
Wrong verb form
is becoming
show examples
easier.
While others
Correct word choice
Others
show examples
believe that
the
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apply
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technology
was not the cause
for make
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of making
show examples
the
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apply
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shopping easier.
This
essay will discuss both sides and will draw my personal conclusion.
In
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On
show examples
one
Correct article usage
the one
show examples
hand,
technology
could make our purchases easier. The main reason given to support
this
claim is that
,
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apply
show examples
number
Change the article
the number
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of cars
become
Verb problem
is
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increasing rapidly, so a lot of people
goes
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go
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to malls
for buying
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to buy
show examples
which
make
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makes
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traffic
gam
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jam
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and waste time, but
by
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with
show examples
the
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apply
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technology
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technology,
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we can avoid all of that. To illustrate, the malls make special applications for them which
allowed
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allow
show examples
for
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apply
show examples
the customers to purchase from their homes without moving and the goods will come to them until reach
front
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the front
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their
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of their
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houses. So,
thats
Correct your spelling
that's
show examples
why some think that
technology
should
to
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apply
show examples
be with us when thinking about shopping.
On the other hand
,
technology
has clear
disadvantege
Correct your spelling
disadvantage
disadvantages
related to shop.
For example
, the application for shopping
need
Correct subject-verb agreement
needs
show examples
to
update
Add a missing verb
be update
show examples
every period of time which
take
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takes
show examples
high space on
thier
Correct your spelling
their
cell phones and day by day their phones will be full storage and the application will not open
becuase
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because
it was not updated, so they can't buy. In
conlusion
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conclusion
, after analysis of both point
view
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of view
show examples
. I believe that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
technology
not always will make our shopping easier because buying ourselves affect
on
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apply
show examples
our
feelling
Correct your spelling
feeling
feelings
and will break our daily routine,
also
we will meet new people and maybe our friends.
Submitted by bader.salem2001 on

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structure
Ensure that the essay has a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. The introduction should present the issue and your thesis; the body should discuss the two views and provide evidence; and the conclusion should summarize the arguments and state your opinion. Each paragraph should have a clear main idea and be properly developed with examples.
paragraphing
Work on paragraphing and organizing ideas more logically. Each paragraph should center around one main idea. Avoid presenting new ideas in the conclusion.
examples
Expand on the examples provided to support your points. Examples should be specific and relevant, illustrating the argument effectively.
taskResponse
The essay's response to the task is somewhat limited. To fully achieve the task, you should develop a balanced discussion of both viewpoints and provide a clear personal opinion, which is supported by specific reasons and examples.
cohesion
The writing lacks clear topic sentences and sometimes deviates from the main point. Use cohesive devices appropriately to link ideas within and across paragraphs.
comprehension
Provide more clarity in your concepts and ideas. Ensure that your discussion conveys a comprehensive understanding of the topic. This could be improved with clearer explanations and better-developed arguments.
grammar
Work on grammar and sentence structure to enhance readability and coherence. Vary your sentence length and complexity.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • online marketplaces
  • mobile payment options
  • personalized advertising
  • accessibility
  • compare prices
  • decision fatigue
  • impulse buying
  • financial imprudence
  • privacy and data security
  • transformed
  • streamlined
  • user-friendly
What to do next:
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