Some people belive that robots are very important to human’s future development, whilw others believe they are dangerous and negatively affect society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

#people #belive #robots #human’s #future #development #whilw #society

Robots

have been making our lives so much easier ,

hence

some people think they might not be good for our future or even hurt us in some ways. I strongly disagree with

this

statement. these days

robots

have many benefits for human lives

for example

there are bots that help us heal our mental health , choose things that suit us the best ,learn new things with their help ,or even answer all our questions and do many of the tasks that before them they would take a lot of time and energy from us ,

for

instance

Add a comma

instance,

show examples

chat gpt is a bot that can solve many of your problems and you can ask any question that you want and in some

way

Add a comma

way,

show examples

it will give you the best answers and make you save more time. another thing that leads us to have these negative mindsets toward

robots

is the effect of fictional movies, series , books etc ,that

displayed

Wrong verb form

display

show examples

robots

as villains or creatures who destroy humans take control of the world and start to do evil things

for example

there is a series called west world which the story is exactly about how bad

robots

can be .

while

us humans should be more thoughtful and see the positive effects of these equipment on our world.

to sum up

, except for some workers who have been replaced by

robots

literally, we can only see benefits from

this

technology that helps us every day to raise the quality of our lives.

Submitted by behnazahmadi2004 on Fri Jan 12 2024

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structure

The essay lacks a clear structure with distinct introduction, body, and conclusion paragraphs. This detracts from the coherence and cohesion of your essay. Ensure your essay has a clear introductory paragraph that outlines the discussion topics, followed by body paragraphs where each view is discussed thoroughly, and a final concluding paragraph where your opinion is clearly stated and summarized.

coherence

There is a distinctive lack of topic sentences and clear transitions between ideas. This makes it challenging for the reader to follow the line of argument throughout the essay. To improve, use clear topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph that signpost what the paragraph will discuss, and employ cohesive devices to connect your ideas logically.

task response

The essay doesn't completely answer the task as it fails to adequately discuss both sides of the argument before giving a personal opinion. Both viewpoints should be covered with corresponding explanations and examples before a personal position is offered. Expanded discussion and deeper analysis of the opposing view are necessary for a balanced essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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6Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

253 words

5.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 6.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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Some people belive that robots are very important to human’s future development, whilw others believe they are dangerous and negatively affect society. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Fully explain your ideas

Many things that used to be done by in the home by hand are now being done by machines does this development bring more advantages or disadvantages

Some cities create housing areas by providing taller buildings. Others create housing by building houses on a wider area of land. What solution is better?

Nowadays more and more older people who need employment have to compete with younger people for the same jobs. What problems does this cause? What are the solutions?

Nowadays, distance-learning programs have gained popularity, but some people argue that online courses can never be as good as those taken at a college or university in person. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that teenagers should be required to do unpaid community work it their free time.This can benefit teenagers and the community as well.