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Writing Samples
Band 6

The chart below show the the information about male and female gym membership between 1980 and 2010.

The chart below show the the information about male and female gym membership between 1980 and 2010.
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The line graph illustrates data about the Gym membership taken by the ladies and gentlemen from 1980 to 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, the number of males was more than that of females in the beginning but ended up being less
at the end
Linking Words
. In 1980, about 21000 males took membership
while
Linking Words
 only around 11000 accounted by women. The membership as compared to females, male went up drastically and touched approximately 4000 in 1985 and around 18000 of females. The ladies didn't cross 3000
while
Linking Words
 when it comes to gentlemen it crossed five thousand between 2005 and 2010. The number of female gym
enthusiast
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enthusiasts
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 was climbing gradually and hit a high of approximately 29000 twice in 1995 and between 2005 and 2010. At
last
Linking Words
, it surpassed males being about 19000(female) and 7000 male.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "approximately" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • chart, line graph, bar chart
  • depicts, shows, represents
  • male and female gym membership
  • 30-year period
  • significant increase/decrease
  • stable period, plateau
  • trends and patterns
  • compared to, in contrast with
  • rising trend, upward trajectory
  • plummeted, declined sharply
  • remained steady, fluctuated slightly
  • widened gap, narrowing gap
  • membership figures, subscription rates
  • peaked, reached a high
  • bottomed out, reached a low
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