Some people argue that mass media only bring negative effect to society and should be banned. To what extent do you agree or disagree? Write at least 250 words

Certain
people
think that
mass
media
don’t bring chaos to society and shouldn’t be banned. I agree with the extent that
people
should know the ethical rules in
mass
media
.
Mass
media
can be considered useful for
people
to search for
information
.
Although
some
media
can’t be accessed by
people
, who have limited access to
information
, certain
people
found that
mass
media
is more useful than other
media
.
Moreover
, usually,
mass
media
reaches more isolated
people
than other
media
.
For instance
, isolated
people
have more networks to get the
mass
media
than social
media
.
Therefore
,
mass
media
is more useful than
people
often think.
However
, the extent of my point of view is that
people
, who made the content for the
mass
media
, should know the ethical rules when making it or when commenting on some occurrence. I believe that
people
who use
mass
media
must be wise when using it. Some
people
who are either ignorant or just want to bring chaos to the
mass
media
are the ones who make the
mass
media
feel they should be banned. They tend to make and spread hate and hoaxes to other
people
that make
mass
media
feel unsafe for certain
people
.
Therefore
,
people
who use
mass
media
should know the ethical rules when using it so that other
people
feel safe when using
mass
media
as their
media
to search for
information
. In conclusion,
although
some
information
can be hoaxes or be a
media
outlet
when
Correct word choice
where
show examples
people
can spread hate freely, I believe that
mass
media
can be useful for
people
who only get
information
from
mass
media
even
to
Change preposition
apply
show examples
isolated
people
.
Submitted by hafidzaditaf1 on

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coherence cohesion
The essay provides an introduction and conclusion, but the progression of ideas could be more logically structured to enhance clarity. Consider connecting paragraphs with cohesive devices and clearly outlined topic sentences to guide the reader through the argument.
task achievement
Your response somewhat meets the task requirements, but the argument is not fully developed. To clearly address the question, you need to analyze both sides of the argument pertaining to the impact of mass media and present a more balanced view before concluding. The position is there but needs to be clearer throughout the essay.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Mass media
  • Public opinion
  • Sensationalism
  • Misinformation
  • Consumerism
  • Intellectual pursuits
  • Free speech
  • Unsustainable consumption
  • Hysteria
  • Social change
  • Regulation
  • Pervasiveness
  • Materialism
  • Political outcomes
  • Distortion of truth
  • Advocacy
  • Civic engagement
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