Nowadays, we are surround by advertising in our daily lives. Some people believe this has a positive effect on society. Others, however, say that it is a negative development. Discuss with both views and give your own opinion.

The aim of my project is to examine what are the most popular
film
genres among teenagers in Zetland. To
achive
Correct your spelling
achieve
this
goal I found a table considering some
revelant
Correct your spelling
relevant
opinion polls. In
this
essay
Add a comma
essay,
show examples
I will describe my findings and express my opinion.
According to
the table, Comedy is the most popular
film
genere
Correct your spelling
genre
(33%), followed by Science fiction (27%). Horror movies were chosen by 18% of respondents and situated in the middle of the table. Action and Others genres are
in
Change preposition
at
show examples
the bottom of the list making up (13%) and (9%) respectively. Predictably, comedy movies are rather more popular
then
Correct your spelling
than
show examples
horror ones, The former is almost two times higher
then
Replace the word
than
show examples
the least.
This
difference could be explained by obvious fact. Horror movies make people feel
stressful
Replace the word
stressed
show examples
and anxious during the watch,
instead
of comedy
films
which cause only positive emotions. In any
case
Add a comma
case,
show examples
there are some problems which can arise with watching
films
and the main one – is vision loss. Of
course
Add a comma
course,
show examples
you would not become
blind
Add an article
a blind
show examples
person after watching
films
, but your eyes may be seriously damaged by
screen
Add an article
a screen
the screen
show examples
which
displaying
Wrong verb form
displays
show examples
you
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
a
Change preposition
in a
show examples
film
. To avoid
this
problem you should follow a few simple rules: do not put the screen very close to
face
Correct pronoun usage
your face
show examples
, do not watch more than 3
films
in a row and do
Correct article usage
an eyes
show examples
eyes
Change the noun form
eye
show examples
warmup every 15 minutes. In conclusion, I
bielive
Correct your spelling
believe
that
films
are the biggest influencer among
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
teenagers in Zetland.
Film
characters
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
always become these persons,
who
Change the pronoun
whom
show examples
teenagers want to be like.
That is
why essential to make
films
which show
best
Correct article usage
the best
show examples
types of
human’s
Change noun form
human
show examples
chatacters
Correct your spelling
characters
character
.
Submitted by dulskywork on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task response
Ensure that your introduction clearly addresses the prompt by discussing both the positive and negative effects of advertising. Your introduction currently does not match the given task.
task response
Work on creating a stronger thesis statement in your introduction that guides the reader on what to expect in the coming paragraphs.
task response
Include a balanced discussion of both views presented in the task before offering your own opinion. Your essay should address both the positive and negative aspects of advertising explicitly as per the prompt.
coherence and cohesion
Organize your essay into clear paragraphs, each with a single main idea. Use topic sentences at the beginning of each paragraph to guide the reader.
coherence and cohesion
Use cohesive devices appropriately to link ideas and paragraphs. Avoid excessive repetition of words and work on synonyms and referencing skills.
coherence and cohesion
Ensure your conclusion summarizes the main points of your essay and restates your opinion, all while addressing the prompt directly.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • Advertising
  • Consumer spending
  • Informative
  • Economic growth
  • Free content
  • Media
  • Over-commercialization
  • Materialistic values
  • Vulnerable groups
  • Misleading information
  • Information overload
  • Decision fatigue
  • Artificial needs
  • Overspending
  • Regulations
  • Consumer education
What to do next:
Look at other essays: