IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

▪️The chart below gives information about doctors practicing in Australia over a 30-year period, including their gender and country of origin. ▪️Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

▪️The chart below gives information about doctors practicing in Australia over a 30-year period, including their gender and country of origin. ▪️Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#▪️the #information #doctors #australia #-year #period #gender #country #origin #▪️summarise #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The given graph illustrates the data about the proportion of Australian and international
doctors
Use synonyms
, who were practiced in
Australia
Use synonyms
 based on their sex and during 30 years.
Overall
Linking Words
, the population of
doctors
Use synonyms
 who were born in
Australia
Use synonyms
 was significantly more than the
number
Use synonyms
 of ones who were not native.
In addition
Linking Words
, when it comes to gender, it can be seen that men who worked in
Australia
Use synonyms
 during the given period were more than women, apart from 1996.
According to
Linking Words
 the chart, native Australian
doctors
Use synonyms
 form more than 50% of all
doctors
Use synonyms
 in
Australia
Use synonyms
.
However
Linking Words
, their
number
Use synonyms
 was not similar in all 3 years. They were 60% in 1986 and 2006, and nearly 54% in 1996.
In other words
Linking Words
, the gap between the proportion of native and international
doctors
Use synonyms
 in 1986 and 2006 was 20%, which was halved in 1996.
In addition
Linking Words
, the
number
Use synonyms
 of men who worked as a doctor, in 1986 and 2006 (nearly 54% and 51% respectively) was more than half, compared to women, who were less than half in those years (about 44% and 39% respectively). In the case of 1996, the population of female
doctors
Use synonyms
 was roughly 10% more than male
doctors
Use synonyms
 which formed approximately 45% of the total
number
Use synonyms
, regardless of their nationality.
Submitted by Raeisinarges1995 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "in addition".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words doctors, australia, number with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "give" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "proportion" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "about" was used 2 times.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: