IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

the bar chart demonstrates how many sex that people had in given period

the bar chart demonstrates how many sex that people had in given period
The bar chart illustrates the yearly amount of
visitors
Use synonyms
 to three London Museums between 2007 and 2012.
Overall
Linking Words
,
while
Linking Words
 National Gallery
visitors
Use synonyms
 increased gradually year by year,
British
Correct article usage
the British
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Museum
Use synonyms
 and Victoria and Albert
Museum
Use synonyms
 fluctuated. Victoria and Albert
Museum
Use synonyms
 was the most popular during 2007-2008. Between two years, it had the same number of
visitors
Use synonyms
 which was almost 13
million
Use synonyms
. In 2009-2010
museum
Use synonyms
 experienced a decrease in
visitors
Use synonyms
, to almost 6
million
Use synonyms
 in 2010. After
Linking Words
then
Correct your spelling
that
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, it increased gradually from 2010 to 2012,
peaked
Wrong verb form
peaking
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in
Change preposition
at
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 10
million
Use synonyms
visitors
Use synonyms
. Regarding other museums, annual
visitors
Use synonyms
of
Change preposition
to
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National
Correct article usage
the National
show examples
 Gallery started by nearly 6
million
Use synonyms
 in 2007, increased gradually and
culminating
Wrong verb form
culminated
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 at almost 16
million
Use synonyms
. British
Museum
Use synonyms
visitors
Use synonyms
 fluctuated over the period. It had nearly 13
million
Use synonyms
visitors
Use synonyms
 in 2007, and nearly 6
million
Use synonyms
 in 2008-2009-2010,
then
Linking Words
 increased to almost 14
million
Use synonyms
 in 2012.

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Common mistake: Your writing should be 150-250 words.
Vocabulary: Replace the words visitors, museum, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "increased" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "fluctuated" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "nearly" was used 3 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "almost" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "gradually" was used 3 times.
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