The graph below shows the changes in food consumption by Chinese people between 1985 and 2010.
The line graph compares
meat
, salt
and fish in terms of food consumption
by Chinese people from 1985 to 2010. Overall
, the three foods experienced different trends in the time period. While
meat
and fish rose with some fluctuations, salt
consumption
fell over time.
As the graph illustrates, over the time from 1985 to 2010 fish consumption
was the highest number than other foods starting at 600 grams
per person per week in 1985 followed by a small increase to 700 grams
per a
person weekly in 1990. Correct article usage
apply
Then
, it rose rapidly until reached a peak of around 850 grams
in 2010. In addition
, consuming
Wrong verb form
consumption of
meat
was
increased steadily during that period.
Unnecessary verb
apply
In contrast
, salt
consumption
stood at 500 grams
per person per week decreased
constantly throughout the period. Correct word choice
and decreased
While
salt
and meat
had different trends, both foods were
met Unnecessary verb
apply
at
the same figure in 2010 Change preposition
apply
by
a number Change preposition
apply
around
200 Change preposition
of around
grams
spent.Submitted by oktiviay17
on
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "while".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words meat, salt, consumption, grams with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "graph" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trends" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "increase" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
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