Many doctors say that people in today's would do not do enough physical exercises. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions are there to this problems?
Many a physician holds
a
notion that nowadays the Correct article usage
the
populate
would not do sufficient physical exercises. Replace the word
population
This
essay will delve into possible reasons for this
issue and put forward some practical solutions to address it.
To begin
with, contemporary busy world, undeniably, the
people have Correct article usage
apply
an
hectic Change the article
a
life style
, especially Correct your spelling
lifestyle
who
Correct pronoun usage
those who
is
living in cities. Correct subject-verb agreement
are
In other words
, the massess
are Correct your spelling
masses
pursing
for their professional success, Correct your spelling
pursuing
therefore
, they would not have sufficient time for exercise
. For example
, a well-known business man
mentioned in a recent interview that, since he Correct your spelling
businessman
hasn16 hours long
feverish work schedule, he has not Replace the word
has a 16-hour-long
getting
enough time for Wrong verb form
gotten
exercise
. Besides
, the
people give Correct article usage
apply
last
priority for exercise
due to
lack
of awareness about Correct article usage
a lack
importance
of Add an article
the importance
exercise
. As a result
, obesity and lifestyle diseases are prevalent
in the Correct quantifier usage
more prevalent
socity
Correct your spelling
society
Change preposition
than never
never
Correct your spelling
ever
as
before.
Change preposition
apply
Nevertheless
, there are some vilable
solutions to address the lack of Correct your spelling
viable
exercise
among people. Firstly
, work- life
balance should be promoted and the government should initiate to regulate the maximum working hours not only for employees but Correct your spelling
work-life
also
for employers. In addition
, the public facilites
for Correct your spelling
facilities
exercise
should be increased and well maintained. By doing this
, public accessibility for
Change preposition
to
gym
or wellness facilities will increase. As Fix the agreement mistake
gyms
result
, Correct article usage
a result
the
public health will improve which will decrease the burden Correct article usage
apply
for
Change preposition
on
health care
facilities in the country.
In conclusion, the fast-paced lifestyle and lack of awareness are the Correct your spelling
healthcare
possilbe
Correct your spelling
possible
resons
for reduction of Correct your spelling
reasons
exercise
among the public. Ergo, the authorities should be regulate
for working time and promote Change the verb form
be regulated
infrastrecture
for wellness.Correct your spelling
infrastructure
Submitted by ck.manshad on
Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.
logical structure
Your essay is lacking a clear and logical structure, which has made it difficult for the reader to follow your train of thought. To improve future essays, make sure to organize your ideas in a clear, logical manner, possibly by using paragraphs to separate different points and ensure each is fully developed before moving onto the next.
introduction conclusion present
The introduction and conclusion are present, but they lack clarity and are not well-defined. A strong introduction should clearly state the topic and your point of view, while the conclusion should summarize your main points and restate your position. Make sure future essays include these elements and they are well crafted to frame the essay appropriately.
supported main points
You have attempted to support your main points with explanations but additional specifics and examples are needed to strengthen your argument. To enhance your score in this area, make sure each paragraph has a clear main idea and is supported with specific examples or further explanations.
complete response
The response does not fully meet the requirements of the task. The essay addresses the topic but does not cover it sufficiently, needing a deeper exploration of the causes and solutions. Enhance your essays by fully responding to all aspects of the prompt, and ensure that the ideas presented are clear, thorough, and directly related to the task at hand.
clear comprehensive ideas
Your essay provides ideas that are somewhat clear, but they need to be more comprehensive and thoroughly explained. When writing, focus on developing each point with more detail and clarity to effectively communicate your messages and ideas.
relevant specific examples
Examples used in the essay are relevant but they need to be more specific to effectively illustrate the points being made. Work on incorporating detailed examples that are directly related to the arguments you are trying to make. This will help make your essay more convincing and will demonstrate a better understanding of the topic.
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.
Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.
When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
- for example
- for instance
- to illustrate this
- to give a clear example
- such as
- namely
- to illustrate
- take, for example