It is important for people to take risk, both in professional lives and their personal lives. Do you think the advantages of taking risks outweigh the disavantages?

knp
Correct your spelling
no
? 1. in professional, it shows your capability and how you cope with your work, how you decide, example doctor 2. in personal lives, kalo ga ambil risiko ya bakal di comfort zone aja ga berkembang, contohnya lomba bakal buka opportunities untuk kita develop ourself
People
develop themself
everyday
Replace the word
every day
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by taking risk in decision making. In professional work, it can help them to assess their capabilities by working under
pressures
Fix the agreement mistake
pressure
show examples
.
Meanwhile
Add a comma
Meanwhile,
show examples
in personal matters, they can step out from their comfort zones and discover more of themselves.
Therefore
, I think the benefits of taking risks outweigh the drawbacks. First of all, making risky decisions in jobs can teach
people
how to do
problem solving
Add a hyphen
problem-solving
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.
This
happens because
people
have to navigate solutions to lower the damages that it may cause.
For instance
, doctors have to take
risk
Fix the agreement mistake
risks
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while
operating
their
Change preposition
on their
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patients, whether they should go on with the operation or proceed not to take any actions. Because of
this
, it will make them build their capabilities over time. These
also
work
in
Change preposition
apply
show examples
personally because it makes
people
explore new things in their lives.
For example
, getting married is full of risks but
people
will grow
themself
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
and
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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Risk-taking
  • Professional advancement
  • Innovation
  • Personal growth
  • Fulfillment
  • Resilience
  • Pursuit
  • Potential
  • Failure
  • Financial loss
  • Stress
  • Relationships
  • Risk assessment
  • Risk management
  • Cultural attitudes
  • Mitigate
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