IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4.5

In the future all cars,buses and trucks will be driverless.The only people travelling inside these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantagous

With the advent of technology, the world is evolving faster with several technological advancements making our lives easier. Over the past three decades,
car
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 ownership has seen an unprecedented rise, leading to severe
congestion
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 on the roads. I think the above statement is very true. The
government
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 should take necessary measures to discourage people from using cars. Over the years,
car
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 purchases have increased significantly
. .
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.
...
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 There are several reasons why a person owns a
car
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. The first and most important reason is that they are free to travel from one place to another.
Second,
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they can choose an easy loan from the bank and buy a
car
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.
Due to
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 the affordability and availability of four-wheeled vehicles, people own them and tend to use them for short distances, which has greatly increased
traffic
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congestion
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. To prevent serious
traffic
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congestion
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, the
government
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 is responsible for taking preventive measures and encouraging people to use public transportation. With technological advancement, the
government
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 can bring about change by launching smart cars, which will greatly reduce
traffic
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congestion
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 and pollution. In conclusion, I completely agree that the world is facing significant
traffic
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congestion
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due to
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 the sudden increase in the number of
car
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 owners.
However
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, if the
government
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 introduces cheaper means of transport for short and long trips
then
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 the public may take advantage of it.

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task achievement
Ensure that your essay directly addresses the question by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of driverless vehicles. Your current response doesn't relate to the specific topic of driverless technology but focuses rather on the general issue of traffic congestion and car ownership.
coherence and cohesion
Create a clear and logical structure in your essay that includes an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Each part should sequentially build upon the last to create a cohesive argument.
task achievement
Support your main points in the body paragraphs with specific examples related to driverless vehicles, rather than general statements about traffic congestion and vehicle ownership.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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