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Writing Samples
Band 6.5

the graph below shows the differences in wheat exports over three different areas. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.

the graph below shows the differences in wheat exports over three different areas. Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.
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The line chart given depicts the
amount
Use synonyms
 of
wheat
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 exports (in millions of
tonnes
Use synonyms
) in three different areas namely Australia,
Canada
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, and
European
Correct article usage
the European
show examples
 Community from 1985 to 1990. Generally,
although
Linking Words
Canada
Use synonyms
 started with the highest
amount
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 of
wheat
Use synonyms
 exports,
European
Correct article usage
the European
show examples
 Community finished
at
Change preposition
in
show examples
 the first place.
To begin
Linking Words
 with,
Canada
Use synonyms
 exported the highest
amount
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 of
wheat
Use synonyms
 at the beginning of the period (around 19
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
). It
also
Linking Words
 experienced a
fluctuative
Correct your spelling
fluctuating
fluctuation
 trend and got the peak at 25
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 in 1988. Yet,
Canada
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 finished in
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
second place
at the end
Linking Words
 of the period.
However
Linking Words
,
European
Correct article usage
the European
show examples
 Community exported
wheat
Use synonyms
 at around 17
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 in 1985. It got the highest
amount
Use synonyms
 of
wheat
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 exports at 21
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 in 1990 compared to the two other areas and finished in the first place.
Additionally
Linking Words
, Australia saw a downward trend throughout the period. It began at 15
million
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tonnes
Use synonyms
 in 1985
Linking Words
then
Correct word choice
and then
show examples
 rose
until
Change preposition
to
show examples
 around 16
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
 in 1986.
Moreover
Linking Words
, it gradually declined from 1985 to 1990 (until 11
million
Use synonyms
tonnes
Use synonyms
at the end
Linking Words
).
Submitted by misstiasclassroom on

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Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "at the end".
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Vocabulary: Replace the words amount, wheat, tonnes, canada, million with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: The word "amount" was used 4 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "trend" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 3 times.
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