It is said that travel broadens the mind. What can we learn by travelling to other countries? Should we first explore our own countries? What do you think?

Travelling is generally considered a means to open
one
's vision and broaden their mind
due to
the numerous benefits it can bring to travellers.
This
essay will discuss how travelling abroad is advantageous in enhancing
one
's cognitive ability and the merits of making domestic trips before travelling internationally.
To begin
with, travelling to other
countries
is advantageous to
one
's being open-minded when people are exposed to new language and culture environments. Language is a set up of symbols shared among a group of people, and they consist of different cultures. The way people think, speak, and behave is subjected to the language and culture agreed within their community.
Thus
, travelling abroad is an ideal way to get rid of their old environment and immerse in new ones where they are given the opportunity to absorb new ways of thinking and be more open-minded. Before going to other
countries
, it is suggested to explore
one
's own country first for a deep and solid understanding of their own background, which would better prepare travellers to learn new knowledge when they are abroad. Cultural diversity exists not only across
countries
but
also
between cities and regions within
one
state. Stepping out of
one
's own city and making trips to other places is a preparation for exploring the bigger world outside. The domestic journey will broaden
one
's vision and open their mind in a moderate way so that holidaymakers are not likely to undergo culture shock excessively. Meanwhile, it would expand their repertoire of skills and abilities which are beneficial for trips to other
countries
later.
To conclude
, international travel is beneficial in enhancing tourists' thinking ability and helping them to become more broad-minded. To make full of
this
experience, travellers are recommended to make a domestic journey prior to going abroad as
this
would prepare them to be ready for the experience of exotic languages and cultures.
Submitted by runyaokou on

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structure
The essay has a clear and well-organized structure, which includes an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. This helps in maintaining a logical flow of ideas.
task achievement
Your response effectively addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages of international travel and the importance of exploring one's own country first.
conclusion
The conclusion effectively summarizes the main points and reinforces your argument, providing a strong ending to the essay.

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    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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