Nowadays, a growing number of people with health problems are trying alternative medicines and treatments instead of visiting their usual doctor. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?

These days, self-treatments regarding various kinds of illnesses become more and more common which can lead to serious life-threatening repercussions.
Although
it may seem that public awareness about their health conditions and self-care has improved considerably, in my view, there isn'
t
any excuse to cure yourself without the supervision of any doctor. In
this
essay, I will examine the negative side a little more and introduce my point of view.
Firstly
, when an illness starts to notice you by some symptoms
such
as headache, there would be lots of ailments that can appear by it and your assumptions may be wrong.
For instance
, you may think that you have caught a cold and prescribe yourself some related tablets. What if you need some scans and there are some serious problems which a day would be important to your health conditions?
Secondly
, there are lots of side effects with drugs or wrong diagnoses which you wouldn'
t
know at first sight and they can show up in the long term.
This
only can be prevented by practitioners.I have a vivid memory that my uncle got Covid-19 and he thought he got fine after two weeks by self-treatments and using commonly related medicines, but after a
while
his body became more infectious which caused terminal illness. After years he still suffers from it and it doesn'
t
alleviate completely. To put it in a nutshell, a wrong diagnosis or late visiting of doctors
,
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can cause serious side effects in the long and short terms, some of them wouldn'
t
relieve at all or could suffer you for a longer time. In my view, there are not any pros to self-diagnosis and you should visit a doctor as soon as possible.
Submitted by shabnamoutokesh on

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task achievement
Your essay provides an overview of your perspective on the topic but does not fully address the prompt which asks for your view on whether this trend of trying alternative medicines is a positive or negative development. Ensure that all parts of the question are addressed to fulfill the task requirement.
coherence cohesion
The essay lacks clear progression of ideas. Consider using a range of cohesive devices such as firstly, however, and in conclusion to indicate the structure of your argument more clearly.
task achievement
Support your main points with specific examples. The use of a personal anecdote about your uncle is a good start, but more relevant examples should be provided to substantiate your arguments.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • alternative medicines
  • treatments
  • positive development
  • negative development
  • health problems
  • usual doctor
  • access
  • personalized approach
  • holistic well-being
  • lack of regulation
  • evidence-based research
  • proper medical treatment
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