You should spend about 40 minutes on this task. Missions to explore space are hugely expensive, and there are problems on Earth which demand attention. The number of these missions needs to be reduced. Do you agree or disagree? Give reasons for your answer, and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience. You should write at least 250 words.
The exploration
Correct article usage
Exploration
to
Change preposition
of
the
Correct article usage
apply
space
has been forthcoming popular
in developed countries especially for Correct word choice
and popular
billionare
Correct your spelling
billionaire
society
Fix the agreement mistake
societies
while
the earth
is demanding more attention in
several essential Change preposition
on
problems
. In my opinion, as long as people still live on the earth
, humans must be reliable to solve the problem in their own living
before exploring other places.
Replace the word
lives
To begin
, base
Wrong verb form
based
in
the data, observing the Change preposition
on
space
must spent
Change the verb form
spend
the
gigantic amount of money. Many people around the world argue that Correct article usage
a
bill
should be used to tackle Correct article usage
the bill
problems
in
Change preposition
on
this
earth
. For instance
, the biggest and obvious problems
enviromental
issues Correct your spelling
environmental
such
as climate change which thought by some that changing the outcome of space
missions to alleviate this
issue is more valuable for creating a better place for the next generation. Moreover
, it could be compared
Wrong verb form
compare
between
the results when the money Change preposition
apply
spend
Wrong verb form
spent
in
differentChange preposition
on
subject
. Fix the agreement mistake
subjects
In other words
, taking as a sample, if 100 billion using to explore the
mars change into solving Correct article usage
apply
the
Correct article usage
apply
enviromental
cases, the world presumably has become Correct your spelling
environmental
enviromentally
friendly and healthy.
Correct your spelling
environmentally
In addition
, according to
the
NASA in 2023, Correct article usage
apply
space
exploration such
Correct quantifier usage
apply
predict
littering Correct subject-verb agreement
predicts
space
that presumably impacting
the balance of the world. Rockets and several Wrong verb form
impacts
equipment
in terms of observation in zero gravity Correct quantifier usage
pieces of equipment
has
Correct subject-verb agreement
have
lead
Wrong verb form
led
the
debris floating Change preposition
to the
in
the surface of Change preposition
on
space
. This
issue is not yet show
the detrimental effects directly but Change the verb form
does not yet show
scientist
assume that negative impacts can appear to the surface impacting human life if the leftover Fix the agreement mistake
scientists
equipments
always are added to Change the wording
equipment
types of equipment
pieces of equipment
space
without early preventation
.
In conclusion, Correct your spelling
prevention
presentation
although
space
exploration probably have
Change the verb form
has
beneficial
to support the technology and knowledge in the future, there are enormous Replace the word
benefits
expenditure
to make true Fix the agreement mistake
expenditures
while
the earth
have
too many Change the verb form
has
problems
that can be solved by the money.Submitted by misstiasclassroom on
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Coherence and Cohesion
In your essay, it is important to have a clear and logical structure. Your argument needs to follow a logical sequence, which was somewhat lacking. Each paragraph should focus on one main idea, and this should be supported by relevant examples or explanation.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that both the introduction and conclusion are presented effectively. The introduction should clearly state your position on the topic and preview the main points of your argument, while the conclusion should effectively summarize your perspective and re-emphasise the strength of your argument.
Coherence and Cohesion
Support your main points with relevant details and examples. This is critical in demonstrating a clear understanding of the topic. While relevant examples were provided, the essay could benefit from more specific evidence and elaboration to support the argument.
Task Achievement
Your response must address the task fully, which involves making it clear that you agree or disagree with the statement given. Provide a balanced argument with clear, comprehensive ideas. While there were attempts to do so, there is room for improvement in offering a more nuanced or in-depth exploration of the issues presented.
Task Achievement
Include relevant and specific examples to strengthen your argument. Real-life examples or hypothetical situations that demonstrate your point of view make your argument more convincing. The essay provided some examples but often lacked specificity and detail which could add more weight to your arguments.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.