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Band 4.5

In many cities around the world, pollution levels have risen in recent years. Why are some cities becoming more polluted? What effects does this have?

#cities #world #pollution #levels #years #effects
Pollution
 is a big problem in many
cities
 around the world. It happens when there are too many contaminants in the
air
, water, and
on
Change preposition
apply
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Correct article usage
apply
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the
Correct article usage
apply
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land.
People
 can see and feel the
effects
 of
pollution
 in their daily lives. There are some reasons for
pollution
 in
cities
. The main
cause
 is the many motorcycles, cars, and factories that have risen up in the
cities
. Millions of
people
 use their own motorcycles and cars for their daily activities. The government does not provide proper facilities for public transportation.
This
 condition, of course, will improve exposure to the
air
. Factories
also
 produce smoke and chemicals that go into the
air
 and water.
People
also
 throw away a lot of trash that can make the land dirty. When we use too many things and don't recycle them, they add to the
pollution
 problems. All these conditions will
cause
 global warming, which is dangerous for the earth we live on.
Besides
 that,
pollution
 has tons of bad
effects
 on
people
 and the environment. When all the places have been polluted, disasters will come to our lives,
such
 as floods, landslides,
green house
Correct your spelling
greenhouse
show examples
effects
, etc.
Air
pollution
 can make it hard to breathe and
cause
 many health problems. Water
pollution
 can harm marine biota. Land
pollution
 can have a bad effect on plants and animals.
Therefore
,
pollution
 is a big problem in
cities
. Cars, factories, and
people
cause
 many environmental problems. It has harmful
effects
 on our health and our planet. By making small changes in our daily lives, we can work together to reduce
pollution
 and make our
cities
 cleaner and healthier places to live.
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coherence cohesion
Ensure each paragraph has a clear central topic and that the subsequent sentences expand on that topic with relevant information and examples. It appears that the main points could be more comprehensively developed and supported with specific details.
task achievement
Make certain to directly address the prompt given, offering a fully developed position that stays on topic throughout the essay. Provide a more thorough exploration of ideas with specific examples to fully answer all parts of the question.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • emissions
  • contaminants
  • respiratory illnesses
  • smog
  • carcinogens
  • sustainability
  • aerosols
  • ecosystem degradation
  • wastewater treatment
  • green initiatives
  • carbon footprint
  • urban sprawl
  • renewable energy
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