Nowadays more and more people have to compete with young people for the same jobs. What problems does this cause? What are some possible solutions?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
The job market is currently very competitive in most fields of
work
. In
this
context, many young professionals and mature people are running for the same position, which creates a race where many businesses hire younger candidates to save resources.
However
,
this
can lead to challenges
such
as increased likelihood
to
Change preposition
of
show examples
business mistakes and
age
discrimination
. To solve them, it is necessary to create inclusive workplaces and embrace policies that promote fairness. Nowadays, there are numerous companies hiring young applicants to be more
budget efficient
Add a hyphen
budget-efficient
show examples
.
Nevertheless
,
this
practice can be risky for the business health as a lack of experienced perspectives can lead to serious mistakes.
This
is not because of their
age
, but
due to
the fact that young minds often do not have enough exposure to
work
scenarios, or developed soft skills that will help to address
work
-related difficulties,
for instance
.
Furthermore
, the competition between the youth and older people contributes to
age
discrimination
practices
such
as unfair payments,
work
bullying, and unbalanced workplaces. To tackle these problems, it is imperative that corporations create inclusive
work
environments.
For example
, human resources departments can do it by ensuring that teams are compounded by diverse profiles unifying experienced brains with fresh youth perspectives.
Likewise
, policies need to
implement
Wrong verb form
be implemented
show examples
to establish progressive payments
according to
knowledge and years of practice. In Australia,
for example
, the
Age
Discrimination
Act is a national government policy that workplaces must follow to ensure
a
Correct the article-noun agreement
apply
show examples
fair and equal working settings are established. By adopting these strategies, companies will likely support the decline of problems related to
age
in the
work
market. In conclusion, competition between young and older individuals when job seeking can generate risks for a business and discriminative practices. To solve these, it is necessary to promote inclusive
work
practices and follow policies anti
age
discrimination
.
Submitted by betinhaa00 on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

task achievement
While the essay clearly addresses the task and provides a thorough response, incorporating more varied vocabulary and more complex sentence structures could enhance the expressiveness and depth of your argument.
task achievement
Ensuring that all points are equally and fully developed will strengthen the task response. Some points could use a bit more elaboration and specific examples to fully support your ideas.
coherence cohesion
For coherence and cohesion, make sure each paragraph flows smoothly to the next. Transition words and phrases can help guide the reader through your argument seamlessly.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a well-organized structure with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
coherence cohesion
The main points are logically presented and supported adequately within each paragraph.
task achievement
The response addresses the task completely, identifying problems and suggesting solutions effectively.
task achievement
Ideas are mostly clear and comprehensive, with a good understanding of the topic demonstrated.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Personal fulfillment
  • Unfulfilling job
  • Mental health
  • Physical health
  • Financial stability
  • Job security
  • Societal norms
  • Career choices
  • Pursuing passion
  • Practicality
  • Personal growth
  • Skill development
  • Self-esteem
  • Social status
  • Work-life balance
What to do next:
Look at other essays: