Some people say that the best way to improve public health is by increasing the number of sport facilities. Others, however, say that this would have little effect on public health and that other measures are required. Discuss both views and give your opinion. Give reasons for your answers and include any relevant example from your own knowledge or experience.

There is no doubt that some people believe that the increasing number of
sports
facilities is the best way to improve public
health
,
while
others say that
this
would have little impact on public
health
. In
this
essay, I will discuss the two views and I will extend my personal opinion. On one side , there are several reasons that people think that playing
sports
is the major source to
impove
Correct your spelling
improve
their
health
. One main reason is to be more healthy in our lifestyle because
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
is playing
Wrong verb form
play
show examples
an important impact on our
body
and make it more healthy with full energy.
For example
. swimming
and
Correct word choice
apply
show examples
is one of the
sports
that leads our
body
moving
Change the verb form
to move
show examples
more during swimming.
Also
, there are a lot of examples of
sports
like riding pikes, climbing mountains, running and playing football and basketball. What is more, increasing the number of
sport
Change the noun form
sports
show examples
facilities reduces illnesses and diseases because most
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
sports
build our
body
to
me
Correct your spelling
be
show examples
more healthy . It
also
helps to organize the lifestyle.
For example
,
while
you
Correct pronoun usage
we
show examples
have
time
to play some
sports
, we will not have more
time
to be near TV and watch it for
along
Correct your spelling
a long
show examples
time
.
On the other hand
, other people argue that
sport
Fix the agreement mistake
sports
show examples
would have
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
little effect on public
health
for
variety
Correct article usage
a variety
show examples
reasons
Change preposition
of reasons
show examples
.
First
Add an article
The first
show examples
reason is not helping them to be healthy because it leads their
time
to loss without any benefit.
For example
, they think watching TV is more interesting than doing
sport
. In conclusion, there is no doubt that
sports
facilities would have a larger positive effect on our
health
than other measures. I personally agree with
this
view because it helps to build our
body
to be more healthy.
Submitted by almeem on

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Coherence and Cohesion
Make sure your essay has a clear logical structure. Organize your paragraphs effectively, with clear topic sentences at the beginning of each one.
Coherence and Cohesion
Your introduction and conclusion should be clear and reflect the main points of the essay. The conclusion should effectively summarize your point of view.
Coherence and Cohesion
Ensure that each main point is supported by specific examples or evidence.
Task Achievement
Fully address all parts of the task. Make sure that you discuss both views comprehensively along with your own opinion.
Task Achievement
Develop your ideas thoroughly and ensure your essay is comprehensive. Avoid vague statements and unclear arguments.
Task Achievement
Include relevant, specific examples to support your argument. The examples should clearly relate to the topic and demonstrate the point you are trying to make.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • Physical activity
  • Obesity rates
  • Mental well-being
  • Comprehensive strategies
  • Nutrition education
  • Healthcare accessibility
  • Supportive environments
  • Public health initiatives
  • Multifaceted approaches
  • Socioeconomic factors
  • At-risk populations
  • Health equity
  • Lifestyle choices
  • Preventive measures
  • Community engagement
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