In some countries, there are more young people enrolled in work based training instead of attending university. Do the advantage of the situation outweigh the disadvantages.

In the informational era,
job
markets
are
Unnecessary verb
apply
show examples
always expect employees who have practical knowledge related
with
Change preposition
to
show examples
the specific task. Nowadays, in some parts of the world, many
younsters
Correct your spelling
youngsters
would like to
gether
Correct your spelling
together
practical knowledge rather than
attending
Wrong verb form
attend
show examples
universities. In
this
essay, I will state the advantages and disadvantages of
this
situation.
Firstly
, one of the main advantages of the training based
enrollement
Correct your spelling
enrollment
is that it will help to get
an
Change the article
a
show examples
job
easiely
Correct your spelling
easily
as a result
of, they can do tasks properly.
This
is to say that in the competitive business world, companies have to accomplish their work on time so, they want workers with
job
-related training. For
instace
Correct your spelling
instance
, 95 per cent of IT industry firms
eagarly
Correct your spelling
eagerly
waiting to
recruite trainned
Correct your spelling
recruit trained
employees.
And
Correct word choice
Thus
show examples
thus
, it is easy to enter into
job
Add an article
the job
show examples
market for profession expectors.
On the other hand
, the period of getting the practice is the
hardests
Correct your spelling
hardest
time ever for those individuals who would like work-based training rather than going to educational institutions.
This
is to say that, to acquire practical ideas about
the
Correct article usage
a
show examples
particular occupation, a person
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
to spend a lot of time continuously with
lower
Add an article
a lower
show examples
salary under a
reupted
Correct your spelling
reputed
firm. For
examples
Fix the agreement mistake
example
show examples
, in Sri Lanka, a person
have
Change the verb form
has
show examples
to
gether
Correct your spelling
get her
gather
three years
ground
Change preposition
of ground
show examples
experience in order to
bacome
Correct your spelling
become
a CA finalist.
However
, if he
finished
Wrong verb form
finishes
show examples
his
bachelor
Change noun form
bachelor's
show examples
degree in a university that
will
Wrong verb form
would
show examples
help to get
the
Change preposition
into the
show examples
profession easily but reputed institutions neglect those people.
To conclude
,
occupation based
Add a hyphen
occupation-based
show examples
enrollement
Correct your spelling
enrollment
has its own pros and cons when
compare
Change the form of the verb
compared
show examples
with going
universities
Change preposition
to universities
show examples
and educational centres.
Eventhoug
Correct your spelling
Even
,
it
Correct word choice
though it
show examples
is difficult to get the training for a position, the benefits in terms of salaries and
job
security
is
Correct subject-verb agreement
are
show examples
higher.
Submitted by ajeevatharsan on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
Support your main points with relevant examples and explanations. Make sure your examples are specific and clearly link back to the points they're intended to illustrate.
task achievement
Fully address all parts of the task, and make your position clear throughout the essay. Ensure you provide a balanced discussion if the essay requires an examination of both sides of an issue.
task achievement
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task achievement
Use examples that are relevant and specific to the question. Avoid generic or unclear examples that do not strengthen your argument.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

  • for example
  • for instance
  • to illustrate this
  • to give a clear example
  • such as
  • namely
  • to illustrate
  • take, for example

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • work-based training
  • hands-on experience
  • tuition fees
  • career progression
  • skill gaps
  • technical expertise
  • tailored learning
  • personal growth
  • extracurricular opportunities
  • specialized skill set
  • career adaptability
  • job market
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