IELTS Writing Correction Service /
Writing Samples /
Band 6.5

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The chart below shows the results of a survey about people’s coffee and tea buying and drinking habits in five Australian cities. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.
#results #survey #people’s #coffee #tea #habits #five #australian #cities #summarise #information #features #comparisons
A glance at the bar chart provided reveals some information about the percentage of fresh
coffee
 and
instant
coffee
 bought by Australians, and
also
cafe
 customers in
last
 month in five different cities,
namel
Correct your spelling
namely
 Sydney, Melbourne, Brisbane,
Adelaide
, and Hobart.
Overall
,
it is clear that
number
Change the article
a number
the number
show examples
 of those who went to a
cafe
 for
coffee
 or tea
are
Change the verb form
is
show examples
 greater than those who bought
instant
coffee
 or fresh
coffee
, except in
Adelaide
 which shows a relatively similar amount for
instant
coffe
Correct your spelling
coffee
 buyers and those who went to
cafe
Add an article
the cafe
a cafe
show examples
. People of Sydney, Melbourne, and Hobart have the habit of going to a
cafe
 for drinking, and over 60% of them did
this
 throughout the given period. By
contrst
Correct your spelling
contrast
, residents of
Adelaide
 have the least proportion
in
Change preposition
of
show examples
 going to a
cafe
 with just under 50 per cent of, meanwhile just over 55% of individuals in Brisbane have the habit of drinking
coffee
 in a
cafe
. In the
last
 four weeks,
instant
coffee
 was much more popular than fresh
coffee
 in all these cities.
Instant
coffee
 made up between 50 and 55 per cent of approaches in Hobart, Brisbane, and
Adelaide
, as opposed to fresh
coffee
 which accounted for under 40% in these cities at the corresponding time.
Moreover
, figures for approaches of
instant
coffee
 and fresh
coffee
 are
relativley
Correct your spelling
relatively
 the same in Melbourne and Sydney, with under
a
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
half of
populace
Correct article usage
the populace
show examples
 for both.
Submitted by alifarzaneh on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "last".
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words coffee, instant, cafe, adelaide with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "information" in your introduction.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: