It is common nowadays for each member of family to have their own peace of modern technology. Some people think that this will lead to a break down in the family relationships and communication to what extent do you agree or disagree.

#member #peace #technology #people #break #relationships #communication

In our new modern

world

Add a comma

world,

show examples

each person who

Add a missing verb

is related

show examples

to a family

have

Correct subject-verb agreement

has

show examples

a particular personal

technologycal

Correct your spelling

technological

device ;

however

, a

substaintial

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substantial

number of

indeviduals

Correct your spelling

individuals

guess that

this

will destroy

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

family ties. Though ,

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

I agree with

this

idea , I will explain some views in

this

essay to make it clear.

Firstly

, needless to

say

Add the comma(s)

say,

show examples

that new technology

impact

Change the verb form

impacts

show examples

our

life style

Correct your spelling

lifestyle

show examples

dramaticly

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dramatically

in lots of conditions ; in fact , we can not

scape

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escape

show examples

from the

consequenses

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consequences

of what

this

breakthrow

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breakthrough

brings to us ; to illustrate , consider each member of a family without their phones, it is out of mind in my

immagination

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imagination

;

therefore

this

habitute

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habituate

habitude

which is a new

phnomenen

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phenomenon

causes some problems

such

as getting

use

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used

show examples

to loneliness ;

hence

, everyone pass his

time

with some new

gajets

Correct your spelling

gadgets

which have been replaced

in stead

Correct your spelling

instead

show examples

of his family.

On the other hand

, it is crystal clear that there are many attractive

application

Fix the agreement mistake

applications

show examples

and websites which can fill our free

time

;

indead

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indeed

instead

, by exploring in

visiual

Correct your spelling

visual

virtual

world we

pass

Verb problem

spend

show examples

our

leasure

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leisure

time

alone in order to have fun with our parents and

sibelings

Correct your spelling

siblings

;

therefore

, our communication would become weak and poor in

time

. In conclusion, to recaptulate above mentioned ideas I once again reaffirm that I agree with

this

break

Correct your spelling

breakdown

show examples

down

Change preposition

apply

show examples

which

happend

Correct your spelling

happened

happens

because of the

technologycal

Correct your spelling

technology

owning

Wrong verb form

owned

show examples

Submitted by sajad.bazdar.2012 on Fri Jan 19 2024

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coherence cohesion

Pay attention to spelling, punctuation, and grammar. Consistently incorrect usage can greatly affect the clarity and cohesion of your essay.

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Paragraph 1 - Introduction

Sentence 1 - Background statement
Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
Sentence 3 - Thesis
Sentence 4 - Outline sentence

Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph

Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
Sentence 2 - Example
Sentence 3 - Discussion
Sentence 4 - Conclusion

Paragraph 4 - Conclusion

Sentence 1 - Summary
Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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7Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
32Grammar mistakes
 

4 paragraphs

232 words

<40

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

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It is common nowadays for each member of family to have their own peace of modern technology. Some people think that this will lead to a break down in the family relationships and communication to what extent do you agree or disagree.

Fully explain your ideas

In many cities an increasing number of people do not know their neighbours and there is a lack of sense of community. What are the causes of this problem? How can it be solved?

Some social media marketing’s biggest attraction is that it helps brands to meet a larger online audience. Some people think that the best way to run a business is within the family.

85.Nowadays, most countries improve the standard of living through economic development. But some social values are lost as a result. Do you think the advantages of the phenomenon outweigh the disadvantages?

Some people believe that visitors to other countries should follow local customs and behaviour. Others disagree and think that the host country should welcome cultural differences. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

More and more people are buying ready to eat food instead of cooking themselves. Does this development has more advantages or more disadvantages.