Research shows that business meetings, discussions and trainings are happening online nowadays. Do the advantages of this development outweigh the disadvantages?

✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
Remote conferences, studies, and meetings are pretty common because of the major advancements in modern technologies.
This
essay will discuss how shifting to online platforms from face-to-face meetings is resulting in abundant merits,
such
as financial benefits and
time
efficiency, which overshadow the drawbacks. In regard to the downsides, doing many activities online causes a lack of social and physical interactions, which are the staple needs of human beings, compared to offline conferences. Take lectures,
for example
, remote classes tend to be done in a one-way manner by the professor
instead
of two-way discussion,
not to mention
the lecturers are
also
unable to see the gestures of their students,
hence
why they hardly notice any change in conduct, whether they are focused, sleepy, or uninterested.
Consequently
, it can lead to long-term issues,
such
as poor social well-being and avoidant behaviour.
For
this
reason, online technologies can hardly substitute face-to-face activities.
Nonetheless
, the online conference is proven to be very efficient in terms of
time
and money.
For instance
, a job seeker who applies to a vacancy in a different continent is able to do an online interview with the employer without having to fly all the way to another region.
As a result
, there is no need to spend a great number of money and
time
because either online or offline, the output remains the same.
Hence
, remote meeting is a great alternative for people who are separated by a considerable amount of distance. In conclusion,
although
physical and social interaction may not be obtained from
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
remote schemes, the
time
efficiency in doing daily activities online is an undeniable breakthrough in modern society.
Finally
, the ease of online conferences offsets the face-to-face interaction from offline meetings.
Submitted by pink panther on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

coherence cohesion
Ensure that the essay has a clear and logical flow. While the structure is generally logical, some transitions between ideas could be smoother. Consider using more varied connective words or phrases to guide the reader through your argument more effectively.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to include an introduction and conclusion that outline and summarize the main points of the essay. In this case, the introduction and conclusion are present and set out the arguments fairly well, but you could refine the thesis statement and reiterate key points more strongly in the conclusion for greater impact.
coherence cohesion
When supporting your main points, provide specific examples to illustrate your arguments. You've provided some examples, but they could be more detailed and directly tied to the real-world implications of the issue. Adding statistics or real case studies could strengthen your argument.
task achievement
Respond directly to all parts of the task, ensuring a balanced discussion of advantages and disadvantages, and express a clear opinion. Your response covers both sides and does come to a conclusion, but the opinion could be articulated with more conviction throughout the essay.
task achievement
Present ideas in a clear and comprehensive manner, ensuring each paragraph has a central idea and supporting details. This has been done well generally, but further expansion on each point would create a more thorough and persuasive argument.
task achievement
Use relevant and specific examples to substantiate your points. The essay uses general examples, but incorporating more specific instances would help to demonstrate a deeper understanding of the topic.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

What to do next:
Look at other essays: