Some people say that too much attention and resources are given to the protection of wild animals and birds. To what extent do you agree or disagree?Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

The topic of protecting endangered
animals
has been a long debatable topic. A number of people advocate that a handsome amount of valuable resources can be provided to conserve
such
species
. In my opinion, human beings must take various
measures
to save
animals
that are on the verge of extinction and maintain the diversity of the ecosystem. Enough
measures
have not been taken yet to reverse the situation. A number of distinctive
animals
,
such
as whales, birds etc., are barely surviving the disastrous man-made phenomena like pollution and deforestation.
For instance
, water pollution is affecting the whale population severely,
as a consequence
, reducing their survival rate.
Due to
the rampant deforestation process,
species
of birds have no shelter,
consequently
, surviving among wild
animals
has become a thousand times more difficult.
Such
human activities are reprehensible for these disastrous ramifications. It is the moral obligation of human beings to conserve these vulnerable wild
species
and sustain the balance of the ecosystem.
Moreover
, essential
measures
like reducing the mindless destruction of forests and pollution can bring a positive outcome . The government must enforce laws to regulate devastating human activities towards protecting
such
species
from extinction
Hence
, enough resources and
measures
have not been taken yet to tackle
such
an acute problem. A significant amount of financial resources must be dedicated to
such
honourable activity. In conclusion, the human
species
must pay proper attention to
this
severe problem and bring a comprehensive solution.
Hence
, concerted actions of the government and people towards protecting wild
species
can bring significant change and maintain diversification of the ecological environment.
Submitted by nehakarmakar45 on

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task achievement
Ensure each paragraph has a clear central idea and is well-developed with specific details or examples. While you have put forward your argument, it would be enhanced by including more precise examples to illustrate your points.
coherence and cohesion
To improve coherence, connect your ideas more clearly. Use a range of cohesive devices to link sentences and paragraphs together. While the essay mostly flows well, at times ideas jump too quickly from one to the next without clear linking or explanations.
task achievement
For a higher score, illustrate each point with real-life examples or data where possible, thereby providing stronger support for your arguments. You have mentioned instances like whale population decline and bird habitat loss, but more detailed and varied examples would be beneficial.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • biodiversity
  • ecological balance
  • species extinction
  • wildlife conservation
  • sustainable development
  • ecosystem services
  • habitat destruction
  • endangered species
  • conservation efforts
  • natural heritage
  • human encroachment
  • poaching
  • genetic diversity
  • climate change
  • environmental stewardship
  • protection measures
  • wildlife sanctuary
  • biological significance
  • conservation biology
  • environmental advocacy
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