life was better when technology was simpler? To what extent do you agree or disagree?
In today's era
technology
has overtaken the whole world. The usage as well as
the growth of technology
has been
increased Unnecessary verb
apply
from
Change preposition
in
past
few years. There is an argument regarding that, lifestyle was better when Correct article usage
the past
technology
was not used as much as compared to today. I completely agree with this
notion and this
essay will discuss some points regarding to
Remove the preposition
apply
this
case.
At the onset, There is a quote that " Old is Gold", and this
thing can be related in
Change preposition
to
current
time. In Correct article usage
the current
old
days, almost every work was done manually and because of Correct article usage
the old
this
majority
of people used to stay fit and healthy, Correct article usage
the majority
whereas
on the other hand
, nowdays
we can see that robots and Correct the word
nowadays
machine
Fix the agreement mistake
machines
has
Change the verb form
have
took
Change the verb form
taken
the
Change the word
their
manplace
. People usually start to take benefit of Correct your spelling
place
this
and as a
result
they become Add a comma
result,
compltely
reliable on machinery. Correct your spelling
completely
Thus
, they spend most of their time as a couch-potato
. To prove it, In Correct your spelling
couch potatoes
USA
the usage of Correct article usage
the USA
technology
has been
risen up so much that the Unnecessary verb
apply
citizen
Fix the agreement mistake
citizens
overthere
have started to get health Correct your spelling
over there
disease
Change the noun form
diseases
such
as obesity and many more. This
is just because they dont
want to work with their own hands.
Correct your spelling
don't
Additionally
, technology
have
started to Change the verb form
has
overridden
Change the verb
override
the
brain powerCorrect article usage
apply
Rephrase
apply
also
. Many inventions like calculator
, Fix the agreement mistake
calculators
computer
and so on Fix the agreement mistake
computers
has
been so popular that Change the verb form
have
instead
of using Correct pronoun usage
their mind
mind
or reading Fix the agreement mistake
minds
the
actual Correct article usage
apply
book
, people prefer to use these gadgets. Fix the agreement mistake
books
Although
, these things has
many Change the verb form
have
benifits
Correct your spelling
benefits
but
Remove the conjunction
apply
it
Correct pronoun usage
they
made
Wrong verb form
make
the
Correct article usage
apply
human
stop using Fix the agreement mistake
humans
his
own sense. Correct pronoun usage
their
For Instance
, Around 1990s
a Change the article
the 1990s
women
was elected all over the world and Correct the article-noun agreement
woman
also
set a guiness
world record stating that she was the first Correct your spelling
Guinness
human computer
. Add a hyphen
human-computer
This
was just because she objected to go
over those gadgets and kept trust Change the verb form
going
on
her own Change preposition
in
belief
and Fix the agreement mistake
beliefs
as a result
she was awarded for being the best.
In Conclusion, I completely agree by
stating that Change preposition
apply
old
life was far better than Correct pronoun usage
my old
current
Correct article usage
the current
situatio
. Correct your spelling
situation
The
same way as the coin has two Change preposition
In the
side
, Change to a plural noun
sides
at
some places Change preposition
in
this
things Correct determiner usage
these
had made
a huge benefit on Wrong verb form
have
human
mankind.Correct word choice
apply
Submitted by hlife4454 on
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coherence cohesion
Consider restructuring your essay to have a clear introduction, at least two or three body paragraphs, and a conclusion that reinforces your main argument. Ensure each paragraph has a clear topic sentence and that the following sentences support it directly.
introduction conclusion present
Introduce your essay with a clear thesis statement that outlines what you will be discussing. Your conclusion should restate your main point and briefly summarize the supporting arguments made in the essay.
supported main points
Support your main points with specific examples and elaborations. Avoid making broad claims without evidence to back them up. Use examples from credible sources or hypothetical situations that clearly illustrate your point.
complete response
To fully address the task, ensure you answer the question directly and maintain this position throughout your essay. Make sure to expand on your ideas with clear, relevant explanations that directly relate to how life was better when technology was simpler.
clear comprehensive ideas
Work on expressing your ideas more clearly and comprehensively. Aim for variety in sentence structures and vocabulary to enhance readability and coherence. Avoid repetition and practice using synonyms to improve your lexical resource.
relevant specific examples
You used relevant examples, but to receive a higher score, the examples should be grounded in specifics that demonstrate a clear connection to the argument. Also, be sure to analyze these examples within the context of your argument, showing how they support your overall thesis.
