Completing university is the best way to get a job. while others believe that experience and developing soft skills is more important. discuss both views and give your opinion

There are different standpoints on whether
university
graduates or individuals who
spends
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spend
show examples
their
time
more on enhancing their soft
skills
has
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have
show examples
an easier pathway
in
Change preposition
to
show examples
getting a job. The student who takes the
university
route might have to spend 3 to 4 years in getting their degree to prove
companies
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to companies
show examples
of
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apply
show examples
their credibility,
while
individuals who spend
time
improving their soft
skills
might have a different approach in pursuing their career. On one hand, completing a degree in
university
and spending quite some
time
might sound distressing, but most of the
time
this
always
potrays
Correct your spelling
portrays
portrayed
as a rewarding effort. How school is designated nowadays is for
people
to continue their life in universities and study
further
.
This
might be a default move for the general population but
also
one that takes a dedicated
endeavor
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endeavour
show examples
. On
other
Correct article usage
the other
show examples
hand, spending
time
in refining and
upgradingsoft
Correct your spelling
upgrading soft
skills
also
should not be underlined and be looked upon as a reliable move.
People
who invest their
time
in soft
skills
might find more high-paying
job
Fix the agreement mistake
jobs
show examples
and not be accustomed to a definite salary monthly. Even though they are more free and have more
time
to spend, they are
also
more exposed to a higher spectrum of unemployment. In conclusion, both of the perspectives
offers
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offer
show examples
different values on why their approach is better than the other. Some
people
might argue
to
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as to
show examples
why
university
Correct article usage
the university
show examples
route might offer more stability and assurance towards
people
,
while
other
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others
show examples
might want a more dedicated devotion to their dreams and
skills
of their choice. Both these views
has
Change the verb form
have
show examples
no importance over the others and I support individuals who choose either walk of life.
Submitted by aizawatakeru2 on

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coherence cohesion
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coherence cohesion
Make sure to include an introduction that clearly presents the topic and a conclusion that effectively summarizes your discussion and states your opinion. Your conclusion should reflect back on the points you've made in the body of the essay.
coherence cohesion
Support each point with clear explanations, evidence, or examples. Use more specific and detailed examples to illustrate your arguments and make them more persuasive.
task achievement
Address all parts of the task fully. Your essay should discuss both views on the importance of university education versus soft skills for job acquisition and provide a clear opinion. Explain your view in more depth to better meet the complete response criterion.
task achievement
Work on expressing your ideas more clearly and comprehensively. Use a variety of sentence structures and vocabulary to articulate points more effectively and avoid repetition. Aim for precise and nuanced expression instead of general statements.
task achievement
Integrate more relevant examples to substantiate your claims. Use data, studies, or hypothetical scenarios that are directly linked to the task question to provide a richer and more convincing argument.

Fully explain your ideas

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  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
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    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • theoretical knowledge
  • industry-specific skills
  • career services
  • networking opportunities
  • intellectual capability
  • practical experience
  • real-world scenarios
  • soft skills
  • on-the-job experiences
  • portfolio
  • demonstrated skillset
  • formal education credentials
  • company culture
  • academia
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