IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 5

To succeed in a business, one needs to know math’s. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

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Understanding the role of mathematics in defining
a
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success is subject of a considerable debate. It is my contention that one's ability to master
the
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math
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 cannot define him/her
successful
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success
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 because being successful is not about solving every equation better than everyone. First and foremost,
although
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 possession of an
experty
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expert
expertly
 proficiency in
math
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 can be fruitful in certain circumstances, the whole idea of success is not limited to that.
Conversely
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, success is defined by different variables
such
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 as
an
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immense determination,
persistancy
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persistence
persistency
 and
hardwork
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hard work
.
For example
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, nearly all of the successful individuals existing in today's world are unable to solve simple calculations let alone
mastery
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master
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 in
math
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. To better illustrate my point, we could take
top-noth
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top-notch
 entrepreneurs as
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an example
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example
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an example
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 all of whom are listed on the top-noth
achievers
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achiever's
achievers'
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 list of the world with limited experience in algebra.
Moreover
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, to the best of my knowledge, the most important skill required to be a successful businessman, you need to have a perfect idea to pitch and develop.
The time
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Time
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 is the most valuable asset to
the
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business owners,
therefore
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, rather than prioritizing
the
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apply
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math
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 as a must in their skillset, they hire employees with tremendous
math
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 skills to manage their business. Consequentially, they will end up with more time to make pivotal decisions that will shape the future of their companies.
Furthermore
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, from the time-value point of view, more time devoted towards perfecting soft skills like emotional intelligence, communication and leadership can have an earlier chance of payback to the business executives. In conclusion, undoubtedly,
ability
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the ability
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 to know
math
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 is
as
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a
privotal
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pivotal
 skill required in the field of engineering and technology to succeed,
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however
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however,
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 it does not cover all other professions all of which are measured by other skills.

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Task Response
Make sure to address the task prompt directly by stating your position clearly in the introduction and restating it in the conclusion. This helps to meet the requirement of presenting a clear position throughout the response.
Task Response
Develop clear main ideas in each paragraph and provide specific examples to support your points. This will help to fully extend and support your ideas.
Coherence and Cohesion
Strive for a logical progression of ideas and use cohesive devices effectively to enhance the flow of the essay. This will improve the overall coherence and cohesion of your response.
Coherence and Cohesion
In the conclusion, summarize your main points briefly and ensure that your final statement echoes the stance you've taken throughout the essay without introducing new ideas.
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