Today, most people get married and give birth in their thirties rather than when they are younger. Is it a positive or negative development in your opinion? To what extent do you support this development?
The issue of early weddings followed by a pregnancy before
thirties
has grown in importance over the past few years. Change the article
the thirties
This
is a common dream between
many women, but nowadays Change preposition
among
this
dream is facing drastic changes due to
many factors. Globalization, economic crises and increasing population numbers are contributing for
that. I strongly believe that couples need to be aware and convicts of their situation before Change preposition
to
decide
to have Change the form of the verb
deciding
children
before thirties
.
Correct pronoun usage
their thirties
Although
an
early marriage and pregnancy Correct article usage
apply
is
a desire for many couples, there are some factors that need to be considered. Correct subject-verb agreement
are
Firstly
, due to
the world economic crises which made the number of available jobs decrease considerably and also
the real state industry increasing prices exponentially, directly affecting millions of people and their dreams of constitute
a family and Verb problem
forming
buy
Wrong verb form
buying
the
first residence.
Change the word
their
Secondly
, the cost of living is reaching numbers that average salaries cannot afford. For example
, a study from Boston university
showed that nearly Capitalize word
University
one third
of Add a hyphen
one-third
the
newlyweds in which Correct article usage
apply
the
couples were below Correct article usage
apply
thirties
, do not intend to have Correct pronoun usage
their thirties
children
. The central reason behind this
is the uncertainty of being able to provide a decent life for their children
.
However
, this
scenario is a tendency for our reality these days, I firmly believe that this
situation is a negative development in the
society. Many families are being constituted late or even not starting. Correct article usage
apply
For example
, women having their babies after 35 years old is a risk not only for the mother’s health, Correct word choice
but as
as well
for the baby. The child can be born with malformation and very weak with a risk Rephrase
also
to develop
diseases Change preposition
of developing
due to
their fragile immune system. On
the same way the mother, Change preposition
In
that
can face serious health problems and Correct pronoun usage
apply
also
a big risk of losing the child.
To conclude
, a mature decision must be made for the couple. Not only the desire of
an early marriage with many sons but, more important than that if they would be able to provide the basics for the Change preposition
for
children
like a health
environment, education and support. In my Replace the word
healthy
opinion
a balance between Add a comma
opinion,
the
desire versus reality must be taken Correct article usage
apply
in
consideration before Change preposition
into
take
a decision. After that within the Verb problem
making
couple
limits, decideChange noun form
couple's
Change preposition
on a
a
proper age to get married and have their Correct article usage
the
children
.Submitted by aiforeducation2023 on
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Introduction
Begin with a clear introduction that directly addresses the essay prompt and state your opinion on the matter. Present the topic in a neutral way before offering your personal perspective.
Coherence
Organize your essay with clear paragraphs, each with a central idea that is elaborated upon. Ensure each paragraph flows logically to the next with appropriate use of linking words.
Supporting Examples
Support your main points with specific examples. Your reference to the study from Boston University is a good start, but provide more statistics or concrete examples to back up your points.
Conclusion
Provide a more focused conclusion that summarizes your main points and restates your opinion in a clear, strong manner. Ensure this mirrors your introduction for cohesion.
Task Response
Fully address all parts of the task. Discuss both sides of the argument (positive and negative) and provide a clear position on the extent to which you support the development.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.