Many people think modern communication technology is having some negative effects on social relationship. To what extent do you agree or disagree?
There is an
onoing
debate about the advanced Correct your spelling
ongoing
comunication
system and whether it has a Correct your spelling
communication
negetive
impact Correct your spelling
negative
of
Change preposition
on
individuals
social life. My perspective is, Change noun form
individuals'
individual's
although
Correct word choice
that although
this
matter can have huge beneficience
on instant Correct your spelling
benefits
communication
and global relation
, the side effects on social relationships are Fix the agreement mistake
relations
extermely
severe and must be supervised.
Correct your spelling
extremely
To begin
with, virtual communication
services threatens
the personal lives of Correct subject-verb agreement
threaten
peaple
. Correct your spelling
people
Internet
is a fragile system that can be hacked and the personal information of individuals can be easily Correct article usage
The Internet
missued
. In fact, Correct your spelling
missed
misused
issued
this
matter can cause the foundation for cyberbulling
in which human beings are feeble to Correct your spelling
cyberbullying
cyber bullying
frauds
. Fix the agreement mistake
fraud
Therefore
, the
modern Correct article usage
apply
communication
can not posses
a suitable Correct your spelling
possess
secuered invironment
for the masses.
Correct your spelling
secure environment
Moreover
, utilising developed technology for interaction
can cause deprivation of a normal lifestyle. This
technology can diminish the quality of in-person communication
which can weaken the social bond. This
means that face to face
Add a hyphen
face-to-face
interaction
will be limited without which social isolation will ocure
. For Correct your spelling
occur
cure
instans
, scientists Correct your spelling
instance
belive
that Correct your spelling
believe
the
huge amount of Correct article usage
a
a considrable
Correct word choice
consistent
interaction
is dedicated to a
Correct article usage
apply
sustainble
non-verbal cues which will lead to a remarkable understanding. If the use of Correct your spelling
sustainable
internet
and other improved Add an article
the internet
technoogy
Correct your spelling
technologies
expaned
, residents will face Correct your spelling
expands
less
social skills and be deprived Correct quantifier usage
fewer
from
meaningful Change the preposition
of
connection
. Fix the agreement mistake
connections
Thus
, not only their livelihood will becom
isolated, but Correct your spelling
become
also
the
social Correct article usage
apply
interaction
will be substandard.
In conclusion, my point of view is, even
though Correct word choice
that even
internet
has numerous beneficial aspects Add an article
the internet
on
communities, since it can cause deprivation of Change preposition
for
a
suitable social Correct article usage
apply
interaction
and leads
to fraud the negative impacts Correct subject-verb agreement
lead
outweighs
the Correct subject-verb agreement
outweigh
advantagouse
. Correct your spelling
advantages
However
, with a
qualified Remove the article
apply
supervision
these challenges will be Add a comma
supervision,
limitted
.Correct your spelling
limited
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Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.
Linking words for giving examples:
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