The chart and table below give information about tourists at a particular holiday resort in Australia.

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The pie chart reveals the
numbers
Fix the agreement mistake
number
show examples
of
people
Use synonyms
when
Correct word choice
who
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visiting
Wrong verb form
visit
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certain
holiday
Use synonyms
resort
Fix the agreement mistake
resorts
show examples
in Australia. Meanwhile, the table compares essential information during their
holiday
Use synonyms
pursuit based on their original country. It can be seen that
,
Remove the comma
apply
show examples
the
holiday
Use synonyms
resort is dominated by Asian
people
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
, individuals from each country have their own
preference
Fix the agreement mistake
preferences
show examples
while
Linking Words
staying at the resort, with Europeans
people
Use synonyms
take
Wrong verb form
taking
show examples
the longest stay. There are 37% of Asian
people
Use synonyms
who like to spend their
holiday
Use synonyms
in one of the Australian sanctum, which
make
Change the verb form
makes
show examples
them the highest visitors. Less than 2%
from
Change preposition
of
show examples
that number, European tourists
also
Linking Words
dominated that place since 35% of the population are
also
Linking Words
going there.
In addition
Linking Words
, the probability
to meet
Change preposition
of meeting
show examples
visitors from the U.S. or other countries on
the
Change the word
their
show examples
stays
Fix the agreement mistake
stay
show examples
is not high, since there are only 18% and 10% of them
who
Correct pronoun usage
apply
show examples
visit the place. Regarding their
holiday
Use synonyms
style,
although
Linking Words
visitors from America tend to have seven days longer
of
Change preposition
apply
show examples
holiday
Use synonyms
period rather than Asian
people
Use synonyms
, both of them prefer to stay in up to 3-star hotels and do similar sightseeing
activity
Fix the agreement mistake
activities
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.
On the other hand
Linking Words
, tourists from Europe and other regions accommodate themselves in a camp or campervan and share similar hobbies to do beach activities during their vacation, with the discrepancy
for
Change preposition
of
show examples
six days longer for Europeans regarding the length of
staying
Replace the word
stay
show examples
.
Submitted by ru.kabiru.biru on

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Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, holiday with synonyms.
Vocabulary: Only 6 basic words for charts were used.
Vocabulary: The word "stay" was used 3 times.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Tourist influx
  • Peak season
  • Demographic information
  • Fluctuations
  • Duration of stay
  • Preferred accommodations
  • Analyze
  • Trends
  • Patterns
  • Compare and contrast
  • Speculate
  • Marketing campaigns
  • Management
  • Data
  • Notable
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