IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 4

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010

The two maps below show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010
#two #maps #show #road #access #city
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The pictures depict changes
of
Change preposition
in
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road
Use synonyms
 access to a
city
Use synonyms
 hospital in 2007 compared to in 2010.
Overall
Linking Words
, it can be seen that the access
road
Use synonyms
 to the hospital
undergo
Wrong verb form
has undergone
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 a major development with the construction of some new facilities and
extension
Correct article usage
the extension
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 of existing facilities. One feature that has not experienced change since 2007 is the Ring
Road
Use synonyms
 surrounding the
city
Use synonyms
 hospital.
However
Linking Words
,
new
Add an article
the new
a new
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 roundabout was built in front of the
city
Use synonyms
 hospital and at the cross-section of
Use synonyms
city
Correct article usage
the city
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road
Use synonyms
 connected through Hospital
Road
Use synonyms
.
Furthermore
Linking Words
,
in
Change preposition
on
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 the east side of the hospital,
new
Correct article usage
a new
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 public car
part
Correct your spelling
park
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 was constructed and was separated from
staff
Correct article usage
the staff
show examples
 park
like
Change preposition
apply
show examples
in 2007.
In addition
Linking Words
,
bus
Correct article usage
the bus
show examples
 stop
in
Change preposition
on
show examples
 the west side of the hospital
road
Use synonyms
 was removed and replaced by the bus station.
This
Linking Words
 station
connected
Add a missing verb
is connected
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 to the new roundabout and hospital
road
Use synonyms
. On the east side of the hospital
road
Use synonyms
,
bust
Add an article
the bust
a bust
show examples
 stop was removed and became
only
Add an article
an only
the only
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 area for
staff
Add an article
the staff
a staff
show examples
 car park.
Submitted by periset on

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Introduction: The introduction is missing.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Basic structure: Change the third paragraph.
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Introduction: The chart intro is missing.
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Vocabulary: Replace the words road, city with synonyms.
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Vocabulary: Only 3 basic words for charts were used.
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Vocabulary: The word "changes" was used 2 times.
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Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the third paragraph.
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Topic Vocabulary:
  • accessibility
  • dual carriageway
  • roundabout
  • traffic flow
  • multi-story car park
  • green spaces
  • pedestrian provisions
  • footpaths
  • traffic signals
  • construction phase
  • ambulances
  • carriageway expansion
  • traffic congestion
  • pedestrian crossings
  • urban planning
  • infrastructure development
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