In many countries, government spent large sum of money on the arts, and this is supported by some taxpayers as both why. Other, however, think that this money would be better spent on health and education. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

1.On January 22,
2024
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2024,
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Sei Rampah District Court opened the hearing
by
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with
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the attendance of
plaintiff’s
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the plaintiff’s
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attorney, the defendant’s attorney (BSRE), co-defendant I (Ministry of Agrarian and Spatial Planning/National Land Agency), and co-defendant II (Indonesia National Land Office of North Sumatera). The agenda of the hearing today was about the reading of the complaint
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Task Achievement
Ensure that your essay directly addresses the topic and provides a clear opinion on the issue discussed. Your current response does not appear to answer the given question about government spending on the arts vs. health and education.
Coherence & Cohesion
Organize your essay into clear paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs that explore both views, and a conclusion summarizing your opinion.
Logical Structure
Provide clear topic sentences for each paragraph to improve the logical structure and make your main points easy to follow.
Introduction & Conclusion Presence
Introduce the topic in the introductory paragraph and present your opinion at the end of the introduction to meet the basic requirements of a task response.
Supported Main Points
Support your main points with relevant examples or explanations that specifically relate to the governmental spending on arts compared to health and education. The current text lacks these supports.
Clear & Comprehensive Ideas
Develop your paragraphs with clear and comprehensive ideas that directly relate to the essay topic, for both supporting and opposing views.
Relevant & Specific Examples
Use specific examples to illustrate the points you are making, whether it is about the benefits of arts funding or the necessity to prioritize health and education.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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