Wealthy nations should assist poorer countries with humanitarian relief during natural disasters. Do you agree or disagree?

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In the case of natural disasters, richer

countries

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should help poorer

countries

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in need of humanitarian relief.

This

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essay agrees with

this

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statement because of the global responsibility to help each other and

also

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to prevent

further

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conflicts that might arise. Nations that have the means to do so have the duty to help other

countries

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in need. It is part of our collective duty as humans living on

this

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planet to help each other.

This

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can

also

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build connections between the

countries

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that can

further

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lead to agreements that are impactful for both sides. One clear example is the help Indonesia received when the Aceh tsunami happened in 2004. That was a big disaster that caused a lot of people to lose their homes, if not their lives. Indonesia received help from multiple

countries

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, and

this

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helped Indonesia to bounce back quicker. Another reason is to prevent

further

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conflicts. Natural disasters can cause displacement and diseases to spread, and

this

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might affect not only the country directly experiencing the disaster, but

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at a global scale. As an example, if a natural disaster struck part of an international trade route.

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would affect the economy negatively, hiking prices up because of the shortage of supply. Aside from that,

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can

also

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directly impact people's lives because they're unable to fulfil their needs that came from trade. In conclusion, wealthier

countries

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should help other

countries

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in need with humanitarian help in case of natural disasters because of our shared global responsibility and to prevent

further

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conflicts that might happen.

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example support

Work on expanding your main points with more specific examples. While you provided a general overview and mentioned the 2004 Aceh tsunami as an example, try to elaborate further by detailing the assistance provided and how it resulted in concrete improvements for Indonesia's recovery.

introduction/conclusion

Ensure that your essay has a clear introduction and conclusion. You have done so, but to further reinforce this, you may want to clearly restate your opinion in the conclusion to leave an impact on the reader.

logical flow and transitions

You've organized your essay in a logical sequence; however, continue to refine your transitions between the main points. Doing so will create an even more cohesive flow and strengthen the overall connectivity of your ideas.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

3
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

259 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Humanitarian relief
Infrastructure
Global solidarity
Disproportionately
External assistance
Rebuilding efforts
Disaster response
Investment in stability
Dependency theory
Responsible intervention
Paternalistic
Shared humanity
Sovereignty
Capabilities
Fatality rates

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Wealthy nations should assist poorer countries with humanitarian relief during natural disasters. Do you agree or disagree?

Your opinion

Nowadays, majority of people tend to migrate to cities. What are the advantages and disadvantages of living in cities. Discuss both views

It has been proposed that citizens should only consume food and drink products that have been produced in their own countries. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that violence on television and in computer games has a damaging effect on society. Others deny that these factors have any significant influence on people's behaviour. What is your opinion?

Some employers want their employees to be contactable for work purposes at all times. Does this attitude have more advantages than disadvantages?