Computers are besoming an essential part of school lessons. Discuss the advantages and disadvantages and give your own opinion.
Computers
is
Change the verb form
are
using
on Wrong verb form
used
daily
Add an article
a daily
base
in schools
Correct your spelling
basis
This
essentials provide many Correct determiner usage
These
opportunities
to students
use
computers
and internet databases correctly and this
skill will be helpful in the future
However
, some people argue that computers
negatively affects
Correct subject-verb agreement
affect
to
Change preposition
apply
students
physical and Change noun form
students'
student's
metal
Correct your spelling
mental
health
.
Computers
is
the new future Change the verb form
are
opportunities
to
human beings and Change preposition
for
to teach
Change the verb form
teaching
students
in school precise use
of the gadgets
will affect Correct pronoun usage
them postively
postively
.
The reason for Correct your spelling
positively
that is
because of fast
Correct article usage
the fast
growing
of technological Replace the word
growth
opportunities
teaching students
healthy relationships with computers
will be essential to develop population
. As an example, in many Correct article usage
the population
of
developed Change preposition
apply
countries
the ICT subject is being mandatory subject for all Add a comma
countries,
students
in schools and also
in universities with the reason to increase the correct use
of technologies
.
Computers
and new technologies
are being an important part of providing knowledges
to the Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
students
in school nowadays. This
essentials provide many Correct determiner usage
These
opportunities
to
Change preposition
for to
students
use
computers
and internet databases correctly and engage skill
of using Correct article usage
the skill
gadgets
. However
, some people argue that computers
negatively affects
Correct subject-verb agreement
affect
to
Change preposition
apply
students
physical and Change noun form
students'
student's
metal
Correct your spelling
mental
health
.
Computers
is
providing new Change the verb form
are
opportunities
to develop any fields
of human beings and increase a lot of work to a new level. Nowadays new Fix the agreement mistake
field
technologies
is
growing fast and day by day opening new Change the verb form
are
gadgets
to solve some problems of population
. Add an article
the population
Consequently
, using technologies
in learning
process will be essential to Add an article
the learning
students
. Because it will provide knowledge of technical accuracy which will engage skill to work and find new information in computer sources correctly consuming time. As an example, in many worldwide schools
Add a comma
schools,
the
ICT is being Correct article usage
apply
mandatory
lesson. Add an article
a mandatory
In addition
, in university studies
Add a comma
studies,
this
subject is being
one of the important ones.
Unnecessary verb
apply
Therefore
, in some Fix the agreement mistake
ways
way
Add a comma
way,
computers
may provide
Verb problem
have
negative
Correct article usage
a negative
affect
Correct your spelling
effect
to
Change preposition
on
students
Change noun form
students'
student's
health
. It can cause problems with eyes, posture, mental health
and in worst
cases addiction Correct article usage
the worst
of
Change preposition
to
gadgets
. The reason for this
is incorrect
teaching of technological accuracy. Correct article usage
the incorrect
However
, it can be solved by given
lessons about the Wrong verb form
giving
affect
of Replace the word
effect
computers
if student
sit for a long time Fix the agreement mistake
students
while
studying or playing games, the affect
of playing games Replace the word
effect
to
mental Change preposition
on
health
, why some sites is
not accessible for Change the verb form
are
students
and
etc. As an example the research that Correct word choice
apply
have
been done the Harvard University Change the verb form
has
students
about knowledges
of technical accuracy Change the wording
knowledge
pieces of knowledge
bits of knowledge
given
results that more than 60% of school Wrong verb form
has shown
students
is
not doing the exercises for eyes after a lot of time using Change the verb form
are
computer
and Add an article
a computer
the computer
also
is
not aware of signification Correct subject-verb agreement
are
this
theme.Submitted by aiya.galikyzy on
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Introduction and Conclusion
Your essay does not have a clear introduction and conclusion. An effective essay should start with an introduction that paraphrases the question and states your position. It should end with a conclusion that summarizes your main points and restates your opinion clearly. Consider adding these essential components to achieve a higher score.
Logical Structure
The logical structure of your essay is difficult to follow. To improve coherence and cohesion, organize your ideas into clear paragraphs. Each paragraph should have one main idea, supported by explanations or examples. Use transition words to connect your ideas and paragraphs.
Clear and Comprehensive Ideas
While you provided examples, the ideas presented are not always clear or fully developed. Work on expanding your main points with more detailed explanations and make sure your ideas are comprehensive and easily understood by the reader. This will enhance the quality of your task achievement
Relevant and Specific Examples
Your use of examples is good, but you need to develop them further. Examples should be specific, relevant, and add value to your argument. Make sure that examples directly support your main points and are integrated smoothly within your essay.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.