The inequality between rich and poor nations is now wider than it has ever been before. What do you think are the main causes of this difference and what do you think can be done to reduce the gap ?

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In the modern world, the

gap

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between rich and poor

countries

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has become greater than in the past. In

this

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essay, I will elaborate on some roots of

this

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issue and propose some solutions from my point of view.

To begin

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with, there are several main causes of the widening

gap

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between the wealthy and poverty-stricken

nations

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. The first root may come from disasters

such

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as pandemics or civil wars.

For instance

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, in the case of pandemics,

although

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both the rich and poor

countries

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may be adversely affected, the former, which have better medical facilities and,

therefore

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, better preventive measures and treatment, will sustain lesser damage to their people and economy compared to the latter.

This

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will undoubtedly contribute to furthering the

gap

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between them.

Secondly

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, another cause can originate from an inadequacy of investment in education in poor

nations

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That is

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, the talented in

such

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countries

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can usually be attracted by well-equipped infrastructure in the wealthier, which, in turn, deprives the poorer

countries

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of the human resources necessary for their prosperity.

On the other hand

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, there are several remedial approaches that may be implemented.

First,

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international organizations,

such

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as the United

Nations

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, should urge wealthy

countries

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to aid their poorer counterparts in terms of education and facilities in return for certain benefits that can later be discussed. With

this

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aid, developing

countries

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can upgrade their infrastructure and ameliorate various socioeconomic aspects in order to fight against epidemics and resolve their internal affairs.

However

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, the government should adopt deliberate policies which attract and retain their genius and simultaneously open their economies to foreign investments.

As a consequence

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, with collaboration between the two aforementioned factors, the poverty of Third-world

nations

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can be

thus

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alleviated, narrowing the

gap

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between underdeveloped and affluent

countries

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. In conclusion, disasters and a shortage of educational investment can be the main roots of the ever-widening

gap

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between poor and rich

nations

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Nonetheless

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, by means of the aforementioned measures,

such

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discrepancy existing in our world will hopefully someday be bridged.

lutranthevinh0610Thu Aug 22 2024

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task achievement

Your essay presents a complete response to the task, covering both the causes of the inequality and potential solutions. However, to improve, you could expand some points with more detailed examples or data.

task achievement

While your ideas are clear and comprehensive, there are some places where the language could be slightly more precise. For example, 'wealthier' could be replaced with 'more developed countries'.

coherence cohesion

The logical structure of your essay is good, and your arguments are presented in a clear and organized manner. However, some transitions between ideas could be smoother. For example, using more linking words and phrases to connect your points more coherently.

coherence cohesion

Make sure each paragraph has a clear central idea that is well-supported with evidence or examples. For instance, when discussing international aid, you might give a specific example of a successful aid program.

coherence cohesion

Your introduction effectively sets up the essay by clearly stating what you will discuss. The conclusion also successfully summarises your main points and reiterates your stance.

task achievement

Your essay offers relevant examples that illustrate your points well, making your arguments more convincing.

14
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
3
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 8.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

332 words

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The inequality between rich and poor nations is now wider than it has ever been before. What do you think are the main causes of this difference and what do you think can be done to reduce the gap ?

Some people think that advertising may have positive economic effects. Others think it has negative social effects because advertising makes individuals less satisfied with what they are and have. Discuss both views and give your own opinion.

Some people argue that all experimentation on animals is bad and should be outlawed. However, others believe that important scientific discoveries can be made from animal experiments. Can experimentation on animals be justified? Are there any alternatives?

What do you think are the causes of this? What can be done to draw people's attention to art? The government's investment in arts, music and theatre is a waste of money. Governments should invest these funds in public services instead.

Some people believe that in the future, environmental problems will mean that we are unable to live on this planet. In order to survive, the human species will need to find another planet that can support life. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

Some people suggest that a country should try to produce all the food for its population and import as little food as possible. To what extent do you agree or disagree?