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Writing Samples
Band 7

Some educationists think that international exchange visits will benefit the teenagers at the school. To what extent do the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

#educationists #exchange #visits #benefit #teenagers #school
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Many education experts believe that the global transfer will be beneficial for the youth.
While
 critics raise a valid argument, the advantages of the program are worth the drawbacks. In
this
 essay, I shall explain that
while
 the
students
 will face some hardness, they will acquire valuable and unique experiences that are essential for them in the long run. On one hand, to be able to do international
exchange
 visits, the
students
 need to spend additional months, if not years, compared to the standard educational time. Not only they will be left alone by their class group, but they will be
also
 required to integrate with the new social group in their new school abroad.
This
 is tricky, especially for teenagers in their peak social years, which is
furthermore
, proven by a popular stereotype of lonely
exchange
students
 without any friends.
However
, if the student could oversee the stated challenges, they are going to expose themselves to one of the greatest experiences in their lives. The opportunity to live abroad alone, to learn other cultures and languages, and to make new friends from different backgrounds, are going to build their characters and be a great asset for them in their later stage of life.
This
 claim is supported by many examples of
exchange
students
 who succeed in their careers.
To conclude
, it is a high risk with a high return for teenagers to do international
exchange
 visits,
however
 with a little help or guidance, I believe we could reduce the drawback for the student.
Submitted by gurunnevada on

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coherence cohesion
Maintain a clear and consistent structure throughout your essay. Ensure each paragraph has a clear main idea and that all ideas logically connect to your thesis statement.
coherence cohesion
Aim for a more detailed introduction and conclusion. This will strengthen your argument and provide a clearer roadmap for your reader.
coherence cohesion
Develop your main points more fully with specific examples and explanations. Rather than just stating benefits or drawbacks, illustrate them with concrete details or anecdotes.
task achievement
Make sure your essay thoroughly addresses the prompt. Cover all aspects of the question, showing a clear position and extending your response to each point made.
task achievement
Use a wider range of vocabulary and sentence structures to convey your ideas more precisely and to engage the reader.
task achievement
Integrate more specific and relevant examples to back up your arguments. This makes your essay stronger and shows practical understanding of the topic.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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