You have a full time job and also doing part time evening course, You now find that you can not continue the course. Write a letter to your tutor. -Describe the situation. -Explain why you can not continue at this time. -Say what action you would like to take.

#time #job #part #course #tutor #-describe #situation #-explain #-say #action

Dear Mrs.Smith, Hope you are well. I am writing

this

letter concerning my part-time evening course

that

Unnecessary verb

apply

show examples

started

from

Change preposition

apply

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last

month in your college ,and I have participated in it.

Add a verb

I am

I was

show examples

really keen to pursue my studies in your college.

However

,a problem has arisen. As I explained before,my husband is away and I am in charge of both his office and the home,and I have

full-time

Add an article

a full-time

show examples

job as a secretary at a construction company as well. As you can imagine,I have really a hectic lifestyle and I have responded to many customers.

Hence

,I do not have any me time and

also

have no time for my family.

therefore

,all of these reasons are forcing me to cancel my evening course. I am sure that you would understand my circumstances and I want to give my extreme apology . I really appreciate your kindness

for

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show examples

giving me an opportunity to study in your college for a

while

Remove the comma

apply

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and ask you to accept my

cacelation

Correct your spelling

cancellation

. I look forward to hearing from you. Many thanks for your attention and cooperation on

this

subject. Yours faithfully, Sina Mousavi

Submitted by sinamousavi078 on Tue Jan 23 2024

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coherence cohesion

Ensure each paragraph contains one main idea and develop that idea fully.

coherence cohesion

The overall structure of the letter is logical, maintaining progression in your ideas; however, it may benefit from more explicit paragraphing to distinguish the introduction, situation explanation, and the requested action.

task achievement

The greeting and sign-off conventions are appropriate for the context, yet consider adding a subject line for more formal correspondence.

task achievement

Maintain a polite and formal tone consistently throughout the letter. Be cautious with informal expressions or contractions which may slip into the writing.

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8Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
0Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Grammar mistakes
 

9 paragraphs

181 words

6.00

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 5.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 5.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 6.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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You have a full time job and also doing part time evening course, You now find that you can not continue the course. Write a letter to your tutor. -Describe the situation. -Explain why you can not continue at this time. -Say what action you would like to take.

Some people say that no one should work after the age of sixty-five while others say that they can work as long as they want. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Many people around the world use social media everyday to keep in touh with other people and get news events.Do you think the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

Every year several languages die out. Some people think that this is not important because life will be easier if there are fewer languages in the world. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion.

There is more and more outrage and anger common in society today. Why is this? Is this a positive or a negative development?

Happiness is considered very important in life. Why is it difficult to define? What factors are important in achieving happiness?