Some people think that students benefit greatly from going to private secondary schools, but others assert that private secondary schools have a negative impact on the young generation and the society alike. Discuss both views.

Parents

Use synonyms

have different perspectives on education,

such

Linking Words

as secondary

school

Use synonyms

for their

child

Fix the agreement mistake

children

show examples

. There is no doubt that to achieve the competencies of a student in secondary

school

Use synonyms

, they should have a personal teacher,

while

Linking Words

some

parents

Use synonyms

suggest that the children should play

together with

Linking Words

their friends in the same age group. Personally, I believe that

parents

Use synonyms

should consider private

school

Use synonyms

in secondary

school

Use synonyms

for future education.

Along with

Linking Words

my opinion,

this

Linking Words

essay will discuss both views. On the one hand, some

parents

Use synonyms

decide to educate

thier

Correct your spelling

their

children

Change preposition

show examples

home.

This

Linking Words

condition

make

Change the verb form

makes

show examples

student

Fix the agreement mistake

students

show examples

can

Verb problem

apply

show examples

study at his or her own pace.

For example

Linking Words

, the children have a problem with the math topics, and the teacher will explain more about

this

Linking Words

specific topic only for

this

Linking Words

child. The teacher can

also

Linking Words

monitor and evaluate

Change preposition

apply

show examples

the progress of the

stundets

Correct your spelling

students

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

detail. The other reason is

parents

Use synonyms

are not satisfied

which

Correct your spelling

with

show examples

local

Correct article usage

the local

show examples

shool

Correct your spelling

school

show examples

which the

limitation of

Replace the word

limited

show examples

facilities for study.

On the other hand

Linking Words

, the cost of private

schooll

Correct your spelling

school

which more expensive than local

Use synonyms

school

Fix the agreement mistake

schools

show examples

This

Linking Words

is one

the

Correct article usage

apply

show examples

of the

parents

Use synonyms

consider

Wrong verb form

considered

show examples

in the private

school

Use synonyms

. The lack of social skills

are

Change the verb form

show examples

the

commen probelm

Correct your spelling

common problem

for

this

Linking Words

however

Add a comma

however,

show examples

the

parents

Use synonyms

anticapates

Correct your spelling

anticipates

anticipate

anticipated

this

Linking Words

with

invite

Wrong verb form

inviting

show examples

some

neighborhood

Replace the word

neighbours

show examples

to their house to

paly

Correct your spelling

play

show examples

together.

For instance

Linking Words

some

Change preposition

for some

show examples

students who join in

exctracullicular

Correct your spelling

extracurriculars

like futsal or baske ball there is

need

Correct article usage

a need

show examples

Change preposition

for more

show examples

people to play together. In conclusion,

while

Linking Words

some

parents

Use synonyms

feel that private

school

Use synonyms

is better than local

school

Use synonyms

, I contend

the

Change preposition

with the

show examples

opposing viewpoint. Even though past and present circumstances may appear disparate, it is necessary for us to learn and reflect on events in history to progress ourselves towards a better future.

nazhif27

Jan 23, 2024

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coherence cohesion

The essay lacks a clear and logical structure, which makes it difficult to follow your arguments. Ensure that each paragraph has a clear main idea and that ideas within paragraphs are logically ordered. Use cohesive devices, such as linking words and phrases, to help your ideas flow smoothly from one to the next.

task achievement

While you have attempted to respond to the task, your response is not fully developed. Make sure to discuss both views as the question asks and provide a clear opinion. Additionally, develop each point with more comprehensive explanations and relevant examples to support your argument.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »- a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
2
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 4.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 4.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

283 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

Personalized attention
Academic opportunities
College admission
Scholarship opportunities
Social inequality
Socioeconomic background
Social cohesion
Elitism
Entitlement
Educational standards
Teacher-student ratio
Public schools
Diversity
Inclusivity
Segregation

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