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Writing Samples /
Band 7.5

Some people think that it is more important to spend money on roads and motorways than on public transport public system such as railways and trams. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

#people #money #roads #motorways #transport #system #railways #trams
It is thought that money should be invested in
roads
 and
motorways
 rather than public transportation including railways and trams. I agree with
this
 assertion for several reasons. It must be acknowledged that
roads
 and
motorways
 have been played an essential role in many people's lives and
also
 becoming increasingly familiar to the general public. Many people argue that railway vehicles benefit people as they can hold a large number of passengers.
However
, these vehicles are restricted as they only travel on fixed routes to limited locations. Meanwhile,
roads
 and
motorways
 are far more flexible which offers passengers a range of adaptable routes and locations.
Also
, drivers can easily change the direction they want on these transport systems.
Consequently
, spending on transport systems including
roads
 and
motorways
 brings about a variety of routes and locations that adapt to human demands. Expenditure on
roads
also
 reduces
traffic
 accidents and maintains the
traffic
 flow. By enhancing features,
such
 as
traffic
 lights, warning signs and street lights, drivers will increase awareness of their surroundings which contributes to the decline in casualties caused by
traffic
 accidents.
Whereas
, railways and trams just need a fixed amount of money to ensure they work and do not break down in the middle of the journey.
Moreover
, expanding the road benefits the economic development of the area, as it stabilises the flow of
traffic
 and facilitates transport companies to promote the progress of distribution and the load of groceries.
As a result
, a range of advantages of spending on
roads
 and
motorways
 have been verified. On balance,
although
 railways and trams are beneficial, the benefits of
roads
 and
motorways
 are by far trump it.
Therefore
, I strongly agree with the proposal.

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task achievement
You have a clear introduction and conclusion, which is good. However, make sure to elaborate more on your points with specific examples or more detailed explanations to strengthen your argument.
coherence cohesion
The logical structure is quite good overall, but there are a few areas where your ideas don't flow as smoothly. Consider using more cohesive devices and transition words to link your paragraphs better.
coherence cohesion
The essay has a clear structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion.
task achievement
You have addressed all parts of the prompt and provided relevant arguments.

Include an introduction and conclusion

A conclusion is essential for IELTS writing task 2. It is more important than most people realise. You will be penalised for missing a conclusion in your IELTS essay.

The easiest paragraph to write in an essay is the conclusion paragraph. This is because the paragraph mostly contains information that has already been presented in the essay – it is just the repetition of some information written in the introduction paragraph and supporting paragraphs.

The conclusion paragraph only has 3 sentences:

  • Summary
  • Restatement of thesis
  • Prediction or recommendation

Example:

To summarize, a robotic teacher does not have the necessary disciple to properly give instructions to students and actually works to retard the ability of a student to comprehend new lessons. Therefore, it is clear that the idea of running a classroom completely by a machine cannot be supported. After thorough analysis on this subject, it is predicted that the adverse effects of the debate over technology-driven teaching will always be greater than the positive effects, and because of this, classroom teachers will never be substituted for technology.

Start your conclusion with a linking phrase. Here are some examples:

  • In conclusion
  • To conclude
  • To summarize
  • Finally
  • In a nutshell
  • In general

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • traffic congestion
  • economic efficiency
  • transport of goods and services
  • infrastructure
  • accidents
  • environmental impact
  • individual vehicles
  • affordable and accessible transportation
  • construction and maintenance
  • stimulate the economy
  • sustainable
  • urban development
  • urban sprawl
  • higher-density
  • public transport systems
  • motorways
  • railways
  • trams
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