IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7

Online is the best way to learn a foreign language. Do you agree or disagree?

#language
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It is believed that online is the most appropriate technique to learn a second
language
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. I agree with
this
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 statement because , with the help of advanced technology, learners can learn a foreign
language
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 anytime and anywhere as it facilities
people
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 with ample amount of resources online, and
also
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 helps
people
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 explore different
ideas
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 and cultures.
To begin
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 with, In contemporary society, interweb plays a vital role in
people
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's lives.
People
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 can learn and be fluent in their chosen
language
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 by using several strategies and modules online. Accessing any resources online not only provides a boon to learners but
also
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 helps them with things that stop them from achieving their goals.
For instance
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, in Nepal, Currently, many Nepalese students are preparing for the IELTS examination online, and studying and learning the English
language
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 online is really helping them to get a good band score and it often guides them by giving constructive feedback online.
Therefore
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, online provides thousands of free and paid materials which helps the learner to achieve their goals to a greater extent.
Moreover
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, learning a
language
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 leads to new connections with inspiring
people
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, seeing the world through different eyes and exploring different
ideas
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. The
language
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 we speak shapes our
ideas
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 and thoughts and
therefore
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, learning another
language
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 provides us with a wider vision of the world.
For example
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, research evidence shows that bilingual
people
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 tend to be more open-minded because speaking more than one
language
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 exposes individuals to diverse customs and
ideas
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 and indulges them in perspectives from different cultures.
Hence
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, learning a second
language
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 benefits
people
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 in various fields as it creates numerous opportunities.
To conclude
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, online indeed helps
people
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 to learn a new
language
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 by providing an adequate amount of resources, and it leads to seeing the world with different eyes and exploring various
ideas
Use synonyms
 and cultures.
Submitted by asmitakhatri490 on

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task achievement
You've presented a clear standpoint in favor of online language learning, which is good. However, try to elaborate your arguments by including a wider range of points and implications of learning online. This would show a more comprehensive grasp of the topic.
coherence cohesion
To strengthen your essay, consider organizing your ideas more effectively by using a clearer paragraph structure. Each paragraph should contain a main idea, supported by examples or further explanation.
coherence cohesion
In terms of coherence, to make your argument more persuasive, make sure each paragraph flows logically into the next. Use a range of cohesive devices such as linking words, synonyms, and pronouns to ensure that there is clear progression throughout the essay.
task achievement
You could improve your task achievement score by providing more specific examples to support your points. Detailed examples demonstrate an ability to think critically and reflect on the real-world implications of online language learning.
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