IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 7.5

Education and health care should be funded by the government and free for everyone. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this opinion?

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The government is expected to play a big role in improving the life quality of its
people
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. Especially in public sector areas like
education
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 and health care where it is considered a basic need of any humankind. It is agreed that the citizens should have free access to them. Analysing the impact of prolonging life expectancy,
as well as
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 the improvement in the economy in the long run will prove
this
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.
Firstly
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, free
healthcare
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 would improve the quality of
people
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's lives.
For instance
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, more individuals would have the luxury of not worrying about the payment when they need to go to the hospital even for smaller treatments or vitamins.
This
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, proven by the study in Germany, has increased, not only their country's life expectancy by about 20%, but
also
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overall
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 happiness, and positioned them 10 years ahead of other European countries.
Therefore
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,
this
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 makes it clear that
healthcare
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 should be free and funded by the government.
Secondly
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, accessible
education
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 services are one of the main reasons for economic growth.
For example
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, with higher
education
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 capacity and skill, the community would gain access to more opportunities
in addition
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 to being able to create them by themselves. The same study in Germany supported
this
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 claim by showing the surge increment in
people
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's GDP after implementing the regulation.
Thus
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 it becomes essential for the government to
also
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 distribute and pay for its
people
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's
education
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. To summarize,
healthcare
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 and
education
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 services contribute directly to many vital factors of the nation's success.
Therefore
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,
it is clear that
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 the idea of free
healthcare
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 and
education
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 can be supported.

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coherence cohesion
Ensure that each paragraph is well-developed with clear main ideas and that they are fully extended with explanations and relevant examples to support your arguments. Aim to use a wider range of linking words to improve logical structure and cohesion.
task achievement
Further develop your examples with specific details to support your arguments, enhancing the effectiveness of your essay and strengthening the task achievement criteria. It's beneficial to quantify arguments with data or reference credible sources when providing examples.

Your opinion

Don’t put your opinion unless you are asked to give it.

If the question asks what you think, you MUST give your opinion to get a good score.

Don’t leave your opinion until the conclusion.

Here are examples of instructions that require you to give your opinion:

...do you agree or disagree?...do you think...?...your opinion...?

Discover more tips in The Ultimate Guide to Get a Target Band Score of 7+ »— a book that's free for 🚀 Premium users.

Topic Vocabulary:
  • fundamental right
  • socioeconomic status
  • equal opportunities
  • financial burden
  • economically disadvantaged
  • public health expenditures
  • workforce
  • economic growth
  • waiting times
  • government budgets
  • financial constraints
  • higher taxes
  • reallocation
  • privatization
  • quality services
  • inequality
  • fulfill responsibility
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