The charts below show the percentage of male and female worker in country A and country B. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

#show #percentage #worker #country #b #information #features #comparisons

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Linking Words

This

Correct determiner usage

The

show examples

circle charts

illustrat

Correct your spelling

illustrate

that

Correct word choice

apply

show examples

the percentage of the working area of

men

Use synonyms

and

women

Use synonyms

compared to two

Use synonyms

country

Change to a plural noun

countries

show examples

, A and

Use synonyms

Overall

Linking Words

, It can be

seem

Correct your spelling

seen

show examples

that

Servece

Correct your spelling

service

is the

most

Correct word choice

highest

show examples

rate

Use synonyms

in all

Use synonyms

country

Fix the agreement mistake

countries

show examples

Otherwise

Linking Words

, in

country

Use synonyms

is that

Verb problem

show examples

agriculture is

second

Change the article

the second

show examples

percentage

Change preposition

for

show examples

both

Use synonyms

sex

Fix the agreement mistake

sexes

show examples

, and

second

Correct article usage

the second

show examples

rate

Use synonyms

Change preposition

for

show examples

country

Use synonyms

is the

are

Correct your spelling

area

show examples

of industry.

Firstly

Linking Words

service

Add an article

the service

a service

show examples

area is approximately 50% between

men

Use synonyms

and

women

Use synonyms

respectively in

country

Use synonyms

However

Linking Words

, in

Correct article usage

the countryB

show examples

countryB

Correct your spelling

country B

country

women

Use synonyms

who work in service

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

88%,

also

Linking Words

men

Use synonyms

Change the verb form

are

show examples

65%.

Both

Use synonyms

rate

Change to a plural noun

rates

show examples

Correct subject-verb agreement

are

show examples

more over compared to

country

Use synonyms

A. Moving to industry, the percentage of

men

Use synonyms

is 15% and

women

Use synonyms

is 9% in

country

Use synonyms

Both

Use synonyms

rate

Use synonyms

almose

Correct your spelling

almost

same

Correct article usage

the same

show examples

Also

Linking Words

, in

country

Use synonyms

, male is 32% and female is 11%.

Lastly

Linking Words

, related to agriculture, there is only 1%

Change preposition

show examples

female

Fix the agreement mistake

females

show examples

country

Use synonyms

(

men

Use synonyms

is 3%).

Nevertheless

Linking Words

, the

rate

Use synonyms

is about 30%

Use synonyms

both

Change preposition

for both

show examples

male

Fix the agreement mistake

males

show examples

and

female

Fix the agreement mistake

females

show examples

country

Use synonyms

A (29% and 43%).

Submitted by cuore.degli.samurai on Wed Jan 24 2024

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.

▼

Linking words: Don't use the same linking words: "also".

▼

Vocabulary: Replace the words men, women, country, b, rate, both with synonyms.

▼

Vocabulary: Rephrase the word "percentage" in your introduction.

▼

Vocabulary: Only 5 basic words for charts were used.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "compared" was used 2 times.

▼

Vocabulary: The word "percentage" was used 3 times.

▼

8
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
6
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
29
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Introduction & conclusion present

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 4.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 4.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 9.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

5 paragraphs

161 words

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Topic Vocabulary:

workforce
percentage
male-dominated
female-dominated
sector
industry
disparity
proportion
predominance
statistical
trend
comparison
economically active
gender gap
labor market
employment rate
significant
minority/majority
contrast

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The charts below show the percentage of male and female worker in country A and country B. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons where relevant.

Many people choose to travel abroad to learn a foreign language instead of studying in their home town . What are the advantages and disadvantages of this ?

Some cities create housing areas by providing taller buildings. Others create housing by building houses on a wider area of land. What solution is better?

Learning English at school is often seen as more important than learning local languages.If these are not taught, many are at risk of dying out. In your opinion, is it important for everyone to learn English? Should we try to ensure the survival of local languages and if so, how?

In some countries, an increasing number of children are overweight or obese as a result of eating too much fast food. Banning fast food from school canteens is the best way to fight this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement?

Some people believe that teenagers should study all school subjects. Others argue that they should focus on only the subjects that they are good at or find most interesting. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.