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Band 7.5

having good university degree guarentees a good job. to what extend do you agree

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One of the many measurements of one's capability is their level of education. Some people believe that acquiring a remarkable university degree equates to having a successful career path. Personally, I agree that attending a higher educational institution plays a pivotal role in applying for prestigious jobs. The underlying reason behind
this
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 is the fact that universities not only provide students with the essential knowledge they need but
also
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 the supportive environment. First of all, it is undeniable that a degree is verified to prove an individual's competency in certain subjects.
For instance
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, a lot of people can confidently admit that they are proficient at coding, yet they may not pass the required qualifications to be software engineers
due to
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 not being able to compete with the graduates from computer science schools.
Furthermore
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, the main subjects learned in
such
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 places are usually set to be aligned with the demand of today's industry.
Therefore
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, certifications issued by reputable schools are something that will never be able to be replaced by anything.
Moreover
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, I believe that the majority of students choose to be enrolled in places where they can be surrounded by the best community.
For example
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, being in the same classes with great minds is one of the most appealing opportunities a great campus can offer.
This
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 situation is highly beneficial not only during a person's academic period but
also
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 when they graduate and are in need of recommendations regarding the working industry. That being said, the information graduates exchange exclusively with each other is vitally important. In conclusion, getting an exceptional degree indirectly translates to being acknowledged for the accomplishment
as well as
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 the status of being an educated individual.
For
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this
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 reason, I agree that
such
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 certification matters in terms of climbing the career ladder.
However
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, I do not believe that it is the only quality that companies look for.
Hence
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, I highly recommend future workers not only work hard at school but
also
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 enrich themselves with invaluable experiences from the "real world".

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coherence cohesion
To enhance logical structure, ensure that each paragraph clearly links to the next with smoother transitions and topic sentences that introduce the main idea of the paragraph effectively.
coherence cohesion
Reinforce the introduction and conclusion to be more impactful by directly addressing the essay prompt in a clear thesis statement and summarizing the main arguments more concisely in the conclusion.
coherence cohesion
Support main points with more detailed examples and evidence, taking care to elaborate on how each example supports the core argument of the essay.
task achievement
To more completely respond to the task, address the prompt thoroughly by discussing both sides of the argument or by offering a more nuanced perspective that accounts for exceptions or counterarguments.
task achievement
Clarify and develop your ideas further by providing deeper analysis and reflection on how a university degree can contribute to career success and consider exploring other factors that can affect job prospects.
task achievement
Incorporate more relevant, specific examples and case studies that directly relate to the argument and help to substantiate claims made in the essay.
Topic Vocabulary:
  • Meritocracy
  • Reputable institution
  • Job prospects
  • Globalization
  • Competitive job market
  • Higher education
  • Networking opportunities
  • Critical thinking
  • Problem-solving
  • Communication skills
  • Practical experience
  • Academic credentials
  • Oversaturation
  • Gig economy
  • Entrepreneurship
  • Vocational training
  • Hands-on experience
  • Academic qualifications
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