IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 8

Write a 300 to 500-word ‘end of project’ letter to your client

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Dear Australia National University Director of Admissions, I am Hoang Le Minh and I’m currently interested in attending the Bachelor of Marine Conservation Ecology program at Australia National University. I love the oceans and have joined voluntary programs about cleaning beaches and protecting sea turtles. I believe that I can get more knowledge about marine in
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 Bachelor's program
of
Change preposition
at

It seems that preposition use may be incorrect here.

show examples
 your university, which will be very helpful in the voluntary programs about oceans that I’m going to join
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 summer. Recently, I have finished my high school diploma in LSTS
last
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 month. In LSTS, I started a start-up with my best friends, where we made small souvenirs and bracelets from shells and jewels. After 3 months, we decided to use our profits to go to the beach to collect trash and donate to the local elementary school.
Moreover
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

, I have experience in taking care of sea turtles and coral reefs. I went to the Nui Chua National Park twice to spend a week with the sea rangers to learn about those skills. After that, I decided to take some classes and workshops about corals and their surrounding species. I firmly believe that I have enough skills, talents, and enthusiasm for
this
Linking Words

Usage of linking words is important in IELTS writing. They help create clear connections between ideas in your writing. They improve the flow of your essay by showing relationships between paragraphs and sentences. Using appropriate linking words demonstrates your ability to write cohesively and will help you achieve a higher band score.

 Marine Conservation Ecology program. I look forward to speaking to you and the members of the admissions department. If there any question please do not hesitate to contact me. Thank you for your consideration. Sincerely,

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Coherence & Cohesion
Attempt to structure your paragraphs more distinctly around single ideas for better clarity. Each paragraph should ideally focus on one main point, supported by specific details or examples.
Task Achievement
While your enthusiasm and relevant activities are well-highlighted, expanding on how these experiences have uniquely prepared you for the program can strengthen your letter. Focus on specific skills or lessons learned and directly link them to the demands of the degree.
General
In terms of tone, maintaining a balance between professional and personal tones is key. You’ve managed this well, but be mindful of using too casual language in professional settings.
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