You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. You have recently moved to a new neighbourhood and would like to join a sports centre there. You have found a private sports club. Write a letter to the manager of the sports club. In your letter, introduce yourself say why are you interested in this sports club ask some questions about the club e.g facilities, membership, costs etc. Write at least 150 words.
#minutes #neighbourhood #sports #centre #club #manager #questions #e #g #facilities #membership #costs
Dear Manager,
I hope you are doing well. Let me introduce myself, I am Harsh Desai, and I moved into
this
neighbourhood last
week. Coincidentally, I live right next to you.
I discovered that we have a private sports club
in our area, and I am excited to inform you that I want to be a part of this
club
. I am inclined towards sports very much. Where I was living before, I was the head of my athletic club
. Also
, my son is very keen to participate in any physical activity. By joining the club
, I also
hope that I can make good relations with everyone by meeting them on a regular basis.
Therefore
, could you please provide me with some information about the amenities we have there? Also
, that would be really great if you could share the requirements of the club
so that I can make sure whether I can fulfil those needs, or not. Lastly
, I would like to know what types of membership we have and how much they cost.
I anticipate hearing you from soon.
Yours Sincerely,
Harsh DesaiSubmitted by harshdesai305 on
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coherence cohesion
Your letter has a clear structure with an introduction, body, and closing, but use paragraphs to separate different ideas for enhanced readability.
coherence cohesion
Your ideas are organized logically, even though some transitions could be smoother. Consider using linking words such as 'furthermore' or 'in addition' to connect sentences seamlessly.
task achievement
The letter fulfills the task requirements well by introducing yourself, stating your interest, and asking questions. However, you could enhance task response by providing more details about your sporting interests or potential contribution to the sports club community.
task achievement
Maintain a suitable formal tone throughout the letter. While the tone is mostly consistent, avoiding contractions ('I am' instead of 'I'm') and using a more formal register will improve the tone for correspondence with a manager.
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Linking words are very important in your essay.
To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.
Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.
In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.
Linking word examples:
- firstly
- secondly
- thirdly
- in additional
- moreover
- also
- for example
- for instance
- therefore
- however
- although
- even though
- despite