You should spend about 20 minutes on this task. You have recently moved to a new neighbourhood and would like to join a sports centre there. You have found a private sports club. Write a letter to the manager of the sports club. In your letter, introduce yourself say why are you interested in this sports club ask some questions about the club e.g facilities, membership, costs etc. Write at least 150 words.

#minutes #neighbourhood #sports #centre #club #manager #questions #e #g #facilities #membership #costs

Dear Manager, I hope you are doing well. Let me introduce myself, I am Harsh Desai, and I moved into

this

neighbourhood

last

week. Coincidentally, I live right next to you. I discovered that we have a private sports

club

in our area, and I am excited to inform you that I want to be a part of

this

club

. I am inclined towards sports very much. Where I was living before, I was the head of my athletic

club

Also

, my son is very keen to participate in any physical activity. By joining the

club

, I

also

hope that I can make good relations with everyone by meeting them on a regular basis.

Therefore

, could you please provide me with some information about the amenities we have there?

Also

, that would be really great if you could share the requirements of the

club

so that I can make sure whether I can fulfil those needs, or not.

Lastly

, I would like to know what types of membership we have and how much they cost. I anticipate hearing you from soon. Yours Sincerely, Harsh Desai

Submitted by harshdesai305 on Thu Jan 25 2024

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coherence cohesion

Your letter has a clear structure with an introduction, body, and closing, but use paragraphs to separate different ideas for enhanced readability.

coherence cohesion

Your ideas are organized logically, even though some transitions could be smoother. Consider using linking words such as 'furthermore' or 'in addition' to connect sentences seamlessly.

task achievement

The letter fulfills the task requirements well by introducing yourself, stating your interest, and asking questions. However, you could enhance task response by providing more details about your sporting interests or potential contribution to the sports club community.

task achievement

Maintain a suitable formal tone throughout the letter. While the tone is mostly consistent, avoiding contractions ('I am' instead of 'I'm') and using a more formal register will improve the tone for correspondence with a manager.

Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Linking words are very important in your essay.

To score effectively on your IELTS exam, you should make an effort to implement short concise sentences coupled with linking words.

Almost every sentence in your essay should have a linking word of some sort.

In fact, the only sentences that can omit linking words are your background sentence and thesis.

Linking word examples:

firstly
secondly
thirdly
in additional
moreover
also
for example
for instance
therefore
however
although
even though
despite

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Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

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5Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
1Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Grammar mistakes
 

7 paragraphs

185 words

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0

Logical structure

Single idea per paragraph

Greeting and closing

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 9.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 9.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 7.0

Complete response

Suitable writing tone

Appropriate word count

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Topic Vocabulary:

new resident
engage in
fitness regimen
personal commitment
specific facilities
preferred activities
variety of facilities
membership options
joining fees
benefits
cost structure
included amenities
personal trainers
nutritional advice services
child-minding facilities
social events
eagerness
convenient time
discuss membership

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Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately

Essentional vocabulary list for IELTS Writing 7+

Medical professionals such as doctors or nurses from poorer countries often migrate to richer countries to work. What problems arise from this situation? What measures can be taken to deal with it?

Topic 2: These days many families move to other countries for work. Some people believe that the children in these families benefit from this move. However, others believe that it makes life more difficult for the children. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Some people think that the government is wasting money on the arts and that this money could be better spent elsewhere. To what extent do you agree with this view?

ome people think that visiting museums is the best way for children to learn history, while many others think there are several better ways. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

In many countries, schools have severe problems with student behaviour. What do you think are the causes of this? What solutions can you suggest?