In many countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of crime? How can we deal with those causes?

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It is an undeniable fact that illegal activities are booming at an alarming rate which has threatened the entire, in many nations.
This
essay will not only highlight the reasons behind
this
trend but
also
present some potential measures to take the edge off
this
menace. To commence with, One of the plausible reasons is social media. Since people watch different programs
such
as crime-related pictures on online platforms, including Facebook, and Instagram, they learn how to perpetrate any crime. Crime Patrol,
for instance
, is a well-known serial that assists the masses in learning the techniques of crimes
instead
of preserving others.
As a result
, individuals feel insecure when they are alone. Another
worth-mentioning
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worthwhile
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reason is the lack of stringent laws. To put it simply, if any person commits any unethical activity ranging from rape, robing, and domestic violence, Higher authorities do not take action frequently;
therefore
, criminals do crimes as they do not have afraid of punishment. Despite the abovementioned difficulties, some effective solutions can be taken, and to uproot these grimmer issues, the government can take some concrete steps. One of the most fruitful solutions is that in order to lessen anti-social activities, civic bodies should restrict crime-related movies, which spread negativity and provoke people to do any unusual
behavior
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behaviour
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.
Moreover
, the enforcement of strict laws by regimes led to a decline in the crime rate.
furthermore
, higher authorities should take frequent action against the offenders, which will not only save the lives of victims but
also
restrict unethical activity. To recapitulate, there are two-fold reasons behind any illegal activity
such
as online platforms
as well as
lack of rules. By adopting certain actions by the regime and individuals,
this
problem should be mitigated.
Submitted by jaspreetkaurdasuya on

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Coherence & Cohesion
Your essay addresses the main topic fairly well, but there is room to further develop your ideas and present them in a more organized fashion. Consider creating more distinct paragraphs with clear topic sentences to display logical progression.
Coherence & Cohesion
When introducing and concluding your essay, be sure to paraphrase the prompt effectively and provide a summary of your main points in the conclusion. This will strengthen the introduction and the conclusion, giving your essay a solid framework.
Task Achievement
Ensure each main point is supported with specific examples or data. While you mention Crime Patrol as an example, including real-world statistics or studies can enhance the credibility of your arguments.
Task Achievement
For a more comprehensive response, dig deeper into the causes and solutions of crime. Elaborate on each point made, possibly adding an additional paragraph to explore another perspective or factor contributing to the rise in crime.

Fully explain your ideas

To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).

For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:

  • Paragraph 1 - Introduction
    • Sentence 1 - Background statement
    • Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
    • Sentence 3 - Thesis
    • Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
  • Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
    • Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
    • Sentence 2 - Example
    • Sentence 3 - Discussion
    • Sentence 4 - Conclusion
  • Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
    • Sentence 1 - Summary
    • Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
    • Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation

Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.

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Topic Vocabulary:
  • economic disparity
  • propensity
  • recidivism
  • deterrent
  • rehabilitative
  • judicial system
  • corruption
  • socioeconomic
  • alienation
  • stigmatization
  • decriminalization
  • enforcement
  • gentrification
  • preemptive measures
  • intervention strategies
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