Older people often choose to spend money on themselves (e.g. on holidays) rather than save money for their children after retirement. Is this a positive or negative development?

#people #money #e #g #holidays #children #retirement #development

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During

life

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, many parents prefer to spend their

money

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on their

children

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. But the older they become than more

money

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they prefer to use for themselves than collect them for kids. I believe that a positive effect is much better than a negative one. First of all, as time passes, elderly

people

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start to trust

children

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more.

In other words

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, they see that kids are going to be well-qualified and prosperous individuals and can cope with their problems alone.

That is

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why they are experiencing relief in terms of adoption and endless help to kids.

In addition

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, healthy egoism lets them spend more

money

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without feeling anxious or guilty.

For example

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, many aged

people

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travel a lot, taking high expenditure. They feel that their

children

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's duties are over.

Secondly

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, after a certain age, many

people

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feel that they are going to be older and

life

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is not endless.

Nevertheless

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, they have spent their

life

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, and they have not seen much of what upsets a lot of

people

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This

Linking Words

is because their

life

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has passed in the care of somebody else, even their

children

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Thus

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, many retiring

people

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try to supply the end of their

life

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by pursuing their dreams and endeavours. Evidently,

this

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deliverance can bring the whole family to better harmonical relationships.

To sum up

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, it is the tendency to spend more

money

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on retired

people

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for themselves rather than on

children

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has a certain positive basement.

Such

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things as decreasing internal anxiety and growing wish to follow their own dreams prioritise

money

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expenditures.

Submitted by tarasovnn on Sun Jan 21 2024

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Introduction & Conclusion

Ensure that the introduction presents the topic clearly and previews the main points of the essay. Your conclusion should also restate the main argument and summarize the key points.

Supporting Arguments

Develop your main points with clear explanations and more specific examples to support your arguments. This will help to provide a more convincing and thorough discussion of the topic.

Coherence & Cohesion

Work on creating better logical connections between your ideas by using a wider range of cohesive devices such as conjunctions, synonyms, and referencing words. This will make the structure of the essay clearer and the argument more coherent.

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

Examples make your writing easier to understand by illustrating points more effectively.

Examples, if used properly, not only help you get higher marks for ‘Task Response’ but also for ‘Coherence’.

When giving examples it is best to put them after your main idea or topic sentence. They can be used in the middle of supporting sentences or they can be used to start a new sentence. There is no rule for where exactly to give examples in essays, logically they would come after your main idea/topic sentence or just after a supporting sentence.

Linking words for giving examples:

for example
for instance
to illustrate this
to give a clear example
such as
namely
to illustrate
take, for example

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10
Linking words
meeting the goal of 7 or more
4
Word repetition
meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0
Grammar mistakes
detected issues

0123456789.0505

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0

Logical structure

Introduction & conclusion present

Supported main points

Accurate linking words

Variety in linking words

Lexical resource: 7.0

Varied vocabulary

Accurate spelling & word formation

Grammatical Range: 6.0

Mix of complex & simple sentences

Clear and correct grammar

Task Achievement: 5.0

Complete response

Clear & comprehensive ideas

Relevant & specific examples

Appropriate word count

4 paragraphs

255 words

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Older people often choose to spend money on themselves (e.g. on holidays) rather than save money for their children after retirement. Is this a positive or negative development?

Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

In today’s world, private companies rather than the government pay for and conduct most scientific research. Do you think the advantages outweigh disadvantages?

In the future, all cars, buses, and rickshaws will be driverless. The only people traveling in these vehicles will be passengers. Do you think the advantages of driverless vehicles outweigh the disadvantages?

Some children spend hours every day on their smartphones. Why is this the case? Do you think this is a positive or a negative development? Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Some people say in order to prevent illness and disease governments should focus on reducing environmental pollution and housing problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

Some people believe that professionals, such as doctors and engineers, should be required to work in the country where they did their training. Others believe they should be free to work in another country if they wish. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.