In many countries around the world, rural people are moving to cities, so the population in the countryside is decreasing. Do you think this is a positive or a negative development?
In the
last
century, the trend of immigration from rural areas
to cities has increased significantly, all around the world. It caused the decline of population in the countryside which has brought many issues to both areas
besides
the positive fact that people have got many chances to improve the quality of their life. In my view
in the long term, the cons would outweigh the pros. In this
essay, I will examine both points of view
and introduce my standpoint a little more.
Firstly
, It is widely believed that cities have facilitated more in order to prepare a better lifestyle for their citizens. For instance
, in big towns, you have access to various shopping malls, gyms, cultural centres, hospitals and so on which give you a wide range of options to choose the appropriate one for yourself. In addition
, you have more opportunities for your career or education which is one of the most important factors that can encourage rural people seriously to immigrate. As far as I'm concerned, the reason behind it refers to the first factor, as there are more facilities for life in metropolitan areas
, there should be more people to be employed in order to give those services.
On the other side of the argument, it should be mentioned the fact that in this
situation, rural areas
are becoming more and more abandoned. They usually hold their elderly and their young ones move to urban areas
to find better jobs and broaden their horizons. Consequently
, after a while
these areas
become dead zones and their economic situations deteriorate as it goes. For instance
, my grandparents' hometown which is farmland, has faced these issues and their local careers almost have folded in the last
decades. Besides
, in urban areas
, the problems that are related to overpopulation such
as contamination, traffic and accommodations increase considerably. As a result
, governments should put aside significant resources to develop metropolitan' transport systems, infrastructures, residential buildings and so on to make a better life for their inhabitants.
To put it in a nutshell, in my view
, in the long-term, this
situation can be harmful and would need to be allocated lots of resources to tackle issues such
as pollution and developing infrastructures for cities with overpopulation and in my view
it is better to focus more on countrysides and make more jobs opportunities in those places to balance it.Submitted by shabnamoutokesh on
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coherence cohesion
Your essay generally follows a logical structure, but could be improved by creating clearer transitions between ideas and developing paragraphs that hone in on single main points.
coherence cohesion
Make sure to include an introduction that more explicitly addresses the prompt, and a conclusion that summarizes your arguments and restates your position clearly.
coherence cohesion
Support your main points with more specific examples and evidence to strengthen the argument. This includes using real-world examples or citing studies to give your essay more weight.
task achievement
Your response to the task is complete, but would benefit from clearer and more comprehensive development of ideas. Expand on the implications of each point you raise, and explain how it directly responds to the question.
coherence cohesion
Using varied and complex sentence structures can improve the flow of your essay and demonstrate a higher level of English proficiency.
Word Count
IELTS says that you should write a minimum of 250 words in writing task 2. If you go under word count you will lose marks in task response.
A very long essay will not give you a higher band score.
Aim for between 260 to 290 words in writing task 2. This will ensure a concise essay and will be realistic in terms of time management. You have only 40 minutes to write the essay and you need around 10 minutes of planning time, so you will not be able to write a long essay in 30 minutes.