IELTS Writing Correction Service
Writing Samples
Band 6

The charts below show the numbers of people per household in 1990 and 2000 in New Zealand. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.

The charts below show the numbers of people per household in 1990 and 2000 in New Zealand. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. Write at least 150 words.
#show #numbers #people #household #zealand #information #features #comparisons
✨ Do you want to improve your IELTS writing?
These two pie charts illustrate how many
people
living
Wrong verb form
lived
show examples
 in each New Zealand family in 1990 and 2000. In 1990,
two
Replace the word
two-person
show examples
people
families
are
Wrong verb form
were
show examples
 the most common
households
Fix the agreement mistake
household
show examples
, which took up 31%,
wherease
Correct your spelling
whereas
 only around 7%
families
Change preposition
of families
show examples
 had 5 or 6 members. It's shown that
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
21% of
households
 consisted of 3
people
, ranking the second among all segments. The proportion of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
dwellings having 1 person and 4
person
Change to a plural noun
people
show examples
 are the same, which
are
Correct subject-verb agreement
is
show examples
 17% among all
households
 in 1990. In 2000,
families
 with 3 members became the most
prodominant
Correct your spelling
predominant
 family structure, which increased to 35%, followed by the number of 2
people
families
, which was only 4% less than that. The number of 4
people
households
Change preposition
in households
show examples
 remained
as
Change preposition
apply
show examples
the same as that in 1990, whilst the number of
people
 living alone dropped significantly to 2% in 2000. In terms of 4
people
 and
5
Add a hyphen
5-people
show examples
people
households
, it
tooks
Correct your spelling
took
 up around 16%
among
Change preposition
of
show examples
 total
household
Fix the agreement mistake
households
show examples
 in New Zealand.
Overall
,
2 member
Add a hyphen
2-member
show examples
 and
3 member
Add a hyphen
3-member
show examples
families
 were the most common
households
 in 1990 and 2000, which occupied more than half of
the
Correct article usage
apply
show examples
New Zealand
families
.
Submitted by wuujenna on

Unauthorized use and/or duplication of this material without express and written permission from this site’s author and/or owner is strictly prohibited. Excerpts and links may be used, provided that full and clear credit is given to Writing9 with appropriate and specific direction to the original content.

Sentences: Add more complex sentences.
▼
Linking words: Add more linking words.
▼
Vocabulary: Replace the words people, families, households with synonyms.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "number of" was used 3 times.
▼
Vocabulary: The word "around" was used 2 times.
▼
Vocabulary: Use several vocabularies to present the data in the fourth paragraph.
▼
What to do next:
Look at other essays: