Some people who have been in prison become good citizens later, and it is often argued that these are the best people to talk to teenagers about the dangers of committing a crime. To what extend do you agree or disagree?
It is said that sometimes
criminals
are
good choices in order to give Verb problem
make
speech
to Fix the agreement mistake
speeches
teenagers
about the detrimental consequences of committing a crime
. I strongly agree with this
statement as these can clearify
the dangers based on their experience which is convenient for Correct your spelling
clarify
teenagers
.
Firstly
, it is often difficult to convey people
in their youth area Change preposition
to people
that is
because they consider their parents and teachers too restrictive; so it is better for them to talk to people who have personal experiences
. These criminals
have loads and bunches of bad experiences
resulted
from committing a Wrong verb form
resulting
crime
namely shoplitfting
which some youngsters consider Correct your spelling
shoplifting
it
Correct pronoun usage
apply
as
a minor form of Change preposition
apply
crime
. Therefor
, Correct your spelling
Therefore
teenagers
can face serious effects of engaging in criminal activities.
Furthermore
, facing real consequences has this
Correct determiner usage
the
potentional
to Correct your spelling
potential
influnce
strongly teengares. Talking about the Correct your spelling
influence
reslut
of Correct your spelling
result
commiting
a Correct your spelling
committing
crim
for hours has almost no impact on them, they need to face someone who has experienced it. Correct your spelling
crime
For instance
, one main aspect of education is to teach students about social life and its rules; however
, some of them insist on involving unlawful actions.
On the other hand
, criminals
are not skilled public speakers so they may encourage youngsters to do unlawful actions uninetentionally
as Correct your spelling
unintentionally
teenagers
may find their experiences
so exciting. In more detail, when criminials
are talking about their past, some Correct your spelling
criminals
teenagers
may think this
kind of living is so stimulating so
they are encouraged to experience it by themselves.
In conclusion, it is my firm belief that Correct word choice
that
although
criminals
do not have good
Add an article
a good
background
, Fix the agreement mistake
backgrounds
but
they can prevent Remove the conjunction
apply
teehagers
from committing Correct your spelling
teenagers
Add an article
a crime
crime
by explaining Fix the agreement mistake
crimes
theirown
Correct your spelling
their own
experiences
.Submitted by n97.mortazian on
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structure
Ensure that you have a clear introduction, body, and conclusion. The introduction should set the context and state your position clearly, while the conclusion should reiterate your thesis and summarize the main points of your argument.
coherence
Work on developing clearer topic sentences for each paragraph to guide the reader through the main idea being discussed.
cohesion
Consider utilizing a wider range of cohesive devices, such as 'moreover', 'therefore', or 'consequently', to show the relationships between ideas more explicitly.
task response
Make sure you answer all parts of the question fully, covering why you believe ex-prisoners can be effective in communicating with teenagers, as well as addressing any potential downsides to this approach.
examples
Provide more specific examples to support your points. Rather than general statements about crime and its effects, offer concrete and detailed instances where ex-prisoners' input has had a positive or negative impact.
Fully explain your ideas
To get an excellent score in the IELTS Task 2 writing section, one of the easiest and most effective tips is structuring your writing in the most solid format. A great argument essay structure may be divided to four paragraphs, in which comprises of four sentences (excluding the conclusion paragraph, which comprises of three sentences).
For we to consider an essay structure a great one, it should be looking like this:
- Paragraph 1 - Introduction
- Sentence 1 - Background statement
- Sentence 2 - Detailed background statement
- Sentence 3 - Thesis
- Sentence 4 - Outline sentence
- Paragraph 2 - First supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 3 - Second supporting paragraph
- Sentence 1 - Topic sentence
- Sentence 2 - Example
- Sentence 3 - Discussion
- Sentence 4 - Conclusion
- Paragraph 4 - Conclusion
- Sentence 1 - Summary
- Sentence 2 - Restatement of thesis
- Sentence 3 - Prediction or recommendation
Our recommended essay structure above comprises of fifteen (15) sentences, which will make your essay approximately 250 to 275 words.