Some people decide to start their own business instead of working for a company or organization. Do the advantages of this outweigh the disadvantages?
Some
people
prefer to open their business
instead
of working for others. In this
essay, I will discuss the pros and cons of this
notion.
First and foremost, working for yourself and making your own money
feel better for human beings. When people
serve for a company
or organisation for a long time, they might ask themselves sometimes why they make someone rich. Furthermore
, when people
work
for a company
, there is always a small chance of getting a higher wage or too
slow to get what they really want about their salary. Add a missing verb
being too
However
, when you work
for your own trading, you can earn money
when you become successful. For instance
, Elon Musk did decide to open his business
and he is the richest businessman in the world now.
In contrast
, there are some disadvantages of having own business
. First of all, it is very risky to find a space for your company
in the industry you work
. For example
, you can lose your money
easily if things go wrong and your fame is in the market. Secondly
, it is highly unlikely a small possibility to beat bigger and famous
companies in the market Correct quantifier usage
more famous
while
they are already known worldwide. If new businesses do not have enough money
to run their investment strongly, it is a big job to catch other companies or organizations.
In conclusion, a significant number of people
choose to establish their own company
instead
of working for different companies or organizations. Opening your own business
satisfies people
as well as
makes them earn money
when they achieve their goals. However
, this
idea stands risky and it needs great work
to put the company
in the right position while
bigger's already run the sector by themselves.Submitted by matillazeyrek on
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coherence cohesion
To improve the logical structure of your essay, make sure that each paragraph follows a clear and consistent theme and that the transition between paragraphs is smooth. Use linking phrases to guide the reader through your argument.
coherence cohesion
Include an introduction and a conclusion that are more explicitly defined. Your introduction should provide a clear response to the essay question and introduce the main points you will discuss. Your conclusion should summarise your main points and restate your position on the topic to give a sense of closure.
coherence cohesion
To strengthen your main points, provide more specific and relevant examples that are directly linked to the advantages and disadvantages you discuss. This will help to make your arguments more convincing.
task achievement
Ensure your essay fully addresses the question by discussing both sides equally and providing a clear opinion on whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Show depth in your ideas by exploring the implications and potential outcomes of starting a business.
task achievement
Make use of a wider range of vocabulary and sentence structures to enhance the clarity and comprehensiveness of your ideas. Avoid repeating the same words and phrases, and try to express your thoughts in a more varied and sophisticated manner.
task achievement
Be sure to provide relevant and detailed examples that support the claims you make. Use real-world scenarios, statistics, or studies to demonstrate your points and add authenticity to your arguments.
Answer the 'Advantages and Disadvantages' topic
IELTS advantages and disadvantages questions normally give you a statement and ask you to comment on the advantages and disadvantages of that statement.
Answer structure for the type of essay
- Introduction
- Body paragraph 1 – advantages
- Body paragraph 2 – disadvantages
- Conclusion
Examples to start your body paragraph:
- The main advantage is...
- The disadvantage of this...
- The main benefit...
- Despite these advantages...
- One possible drawback...